My boyfriend (25m) only likes my (24f) bjs 50% of the time, and I'm losing my confidence—need advice/perspective.
Hi everyone, posting on a throwaway because this is a bit vulnerable and I really need some outside perspective.
For context, I’ve always been heavily praised for my oral skills in the past. Every guy I've been with would finish completely shaking after orgasming. I put a lot of effort and passion into it: I do heavy eye contact, cock worship, pay close attention to the glans, the balls, the whole environment, and my partner's entire body. I genuinely enjoy it, so I moan, sometimes touch myself, and I always listen and adapt to what they react to best. I genuinely felt like I had it down to a science.
With my current boyfriend, though, it's a coin toss. Sometimes he finishes shaking just like the others and sometimes he hates it. Absolutely hates it. The frustrating part is I don't change my technique or my routine.
Over time, he’s started pointing it out more dryly or bluntly when he isn't into it. Because I'm a chronic overthinker, this is really starting to get to me, and I'm slowly losing my desire to go down on him at all—which bothers me because I actually love doing it, and love doing it to him.
We do communicate about it, but I hit a brick wall every time:
When I ask him what he didn't like when it goes badly, his answer is literally: "The entirety of it" and when I ask him what he would like me to do instead, he names specific things that I know for a fact I did during that exact session. When I point that out, he denies it, and I think maybe he just doesn't "feel" those things happening.
TL;DR : I feel stuck, confused, and my confidence is taking a massive hit. Is it a sensory thing? A disconnect between his mind and body? How can I approach this conversation better, or what kind of techniques/adjustments should I be looking into?
Any advice or insights would be hugely appreciated.