u/ook-Marketing

I've been with my boyfriend "Ryan" for two years. He's a good guy in a lot of ways — kind, funny, thoughtful. But there's one thing that keeps coming up: my sexual history. Before him, I had a few relationships, I was in my 20s, I did what people do. I'm not ashamed of it, but I'm not going to put it on a résumé either.

Ryan knew all of this before we got serious. He said he was fine with it. But about six months in, he started asking me questions — "how many people?" "was he better than me?" "did you do that with him?" — in moments that felt like casual conversation but always turned into a weird, tense interrogation.

I've told him multiple times that I won't discuss it anymore. I've asked him to stop. I've told him it's in the past and it doesn't matter.

Last week, I got home from work and he was sitting on the couch, phone in hand, with a photo of one of my exes. He'd apparently gone through my old social media tags from like 10 years ago. He started asking questions again. I calmly said "I'm not doing this" and went into the bedroom. He followed me.

That night while he slept, I packed a bag. I left. I'm staying with a friend.

He's been blowing up my phone — "how could you just leave?" "you're being dramatic" "I was just trying to understand you." I told him I'm done being interrogated about things that happened before he even existed.

His friends are saying I ghosted him over "nothing." My friends say I did the right thing. I'm conflicted. AITAH?

My friend "Sarah" and I have been close for 8 years. She's struggled with depression and anxiety for as long as I've known her. I've always been there — late-night calls, emergency texts, dropping everything to go sit with her when she's in crisis.

But lately it's gotten worse. She calls me 5-6 times a day. If I don't answer, she texts "are you mad at me?" and "I really need you right now." She's been showing up at my apartment unannounced at 10 PM. She's asked me to cancel plans with my boyfriend because she "can't be alone."

Last week, I had a terrible day at work. I was exhausted and drained. She called at 11 PM. I didn't pick up. I texted: "I love you but I can't tonight. I need to take care of myself." She responded: "Wow. Guess I know where I rank." Then she sent a string of messages about how everyone leaves her eventually.

I called her the next morning and told her I love her, but I can't be her only lifeline anymore. I said she needs to see a therapist regularly and build a broader support system, because I'm burning out.

She said I'm "abandoning her like everyone else" and that "real friends don't have boundaries." She hasn't spoken to me in a week. I feel guilty, but I also feel relieved. Does that make me the asshole?