u/outsideperspect1ve

FTM. My NICU baby is coming home soon and will need to take fortified bottles on top of breastfeeding. I’m looking for any tips or advice on taking bottles on the go so we feel confident leaving the house.

I don’t want to be oversold on all the baby items out there - we all know there’s a ton of items on the market.

A few suggestions I received already:

- asking for hot water at a restaurant to heat bottles.

- purchasing a portable bottle warmer, not sure which brands are any good.

How do you travel with your milk? Bring coolers everywhere you go? Fortified bottles, do you mix at home or mix on the go?

TIA!!

My husband has barely visited our baby. I have spend every day at the NICU. She has been there for 80 days. He has been a dozen times for an hour or so.
He also keeps making plans and talking about things we should be doing as if life is normal and we never made a baby. It’s starting to get to me.

I’ve expressed feeling alone in this and he says it’s not his fault he has to work.. but he just works a 9-5 on Mon-Fri. He has been working on our house so when he comes home after work to do that I understand. But he isn’t always doing that..

She is set to come home in a few weeks hopefully and I’m wondering what this will look like.

He doesn’t help cook or clean. He doesn’t go out of his way to do anything for me but he would do anything if I asked. I feel like I’m just burning out taking care of everyone.

I’m starting to resent him so much I’m not sure I’ll be able to come back from it.

I’m curious, did anyone else struggle with their husbands/partners not wanting to go to the NICU?

Wondering if some of you would share your experiences about what your sleeping situation is like with your NICU baby that is now home?

My husband keeps talking about how it’s weird to co-sleep. He has two older children from a previous marriage and claims they slept alone in their cribs (in another room) by 2 months old.. I questioned his memory of the timeline, that seems far too early.

I want my baby bedside when she comes home, of course. I have wondered if she will do better sleeping alone just because of the NICU experience but I can’t imagine I will be eager to get her out of our room. 6 months at least is recommended for bedside as I understand.

I don’t want to be pressured to move our baby to another room.

My baby has been in the NICU for a month. Initially the care was great but they have gotten an influx of babies and become quite busy.

An amount of edema in the eyes is normal with a CPAP I’m told, but this is getting worse and worse. On Saturday she started to become quite swollen in which her face looked different. I asked a nurse about it and she said they would watch it. Monday it was really bad in one eye and a nurse admitted they had not been rotating her because it’s harder to access the other side of the isolette with multiple babies in each space. I asked that they figure it out and rotate her anyways because the swelling is bad!

Today, she is unrecognizable. Her one eye is so swollen she can’t even open it and the swelling has spread to half of her face leaving her mouth looking uncomfortable as well. I asked the nurse and she said she would turn her but like why is she even laying on her swollen side now?! wtf.

I don’t even know who to talk to about this. I hate complaining about nurses because they are clearly overworked here and I don’t want care to get worse if I’m causing any trouble. But I’m so concerned. She’s supposed to get an eye exam this week and I don’t even know how they will do that.

I am starting to become terrified leaving my baby here with the number of things that are getting missed.

Any advice?

Looking for a little help on how to manage setting boundaries with grandparents. I don’t have the best relationship with my parents. They don’t respect boundaries very well and have made it hard to manage a healthy relationship with them.

Our baby was born at 26 weeks and we are nearly a month in. I called and told my parents but I haven’t seen them yet. They keep texting me asking for updates and photos.

My issue is that I don’t want to manage anyone else right now. I’m exhausted and all I can manage is myself. There hasn’t been any changes to update on and I don’t want to constantly be having to send these messages or answer calls to have this interrogation conversations.

The other issue I have is the constant ask for pictures. I don’t want my baby’s photos being shared around. I don’t want everyone having a bunch of photos of our baby in this state, all hooked up to tubes and wires. I sent photos when she came and an update photo but they just keep asking for more.

I understand why and I get that they are excited grandparents but it’s just exhausting to me. I don’t know what to do anymore.