AITAH for ignoring my family’s vacation updates?
My mom took my 21 year old sister on an all expenses paid trip overseas and they won’t stop sending me pics. I’m ignoring them on socials and not responding to the photo updates they’re sending to the family group chat.
I’ve been to the specific European country they’re visiting. It was top of my list and was an amazing trip with my now husband BUT I had to work multiple jobs for years to save up for it only for Covid to delay it and drive the cost up even more. I know it’s unreasonable but it made the place feel almost sacred to me. Like getting there was something I had that no one else in my immediate family could be handed.
There’s a long history of me having to save up money to buy things of my own only for my mom and step-dad to feel bad for my younger siblings and get them the same things for Christmas or birthdays. It’s pretty clear to me that’s what’s getting under my skin here but like…we’re all adults now (21,26,31) and this is getting ridiculous.
There is a 10 year difference between my sister and I so I do my best to be understanding that my mom and step-dad’s financial situation is a lot different now than when I was younger but then they go and do stuff like bring my sister to Europe…even though they already pay for both her and my step-brother’s education, vehicles, housing AND pay them WELL to “work” for them so they don’t have to get jobs in the meantime.
It’s not like they’ve NEVER helped me out. They throw me the occasional bone of some free feed for my animals if the crops were good that year and I was recently given part of an early inheritance my mom received from her mom — but we’re talking a difference of me being given a few grand since I had to move out when I was 17 vs them having $50,000 a year worth of expenses paid AND being given an income to live at home for the most part on top of that. This isn’t even the first time they’ve booked a holiday without me AFTER they found out I was going somewhere myself.
It’s such a weird feeling because I’m grateful that I have the freedom to do what I want, when I want, since I’m financially independent. I’ve even done other amazing trips since this place. I’m not annoyed they’re taking her somewhere in general — she’s been working really hard in school and top of all her classes. It just feels so intentional that out of anywhere in the world they could have brought her (like idk, maybe HER first pick in destinations???) but they chose MY first pick. I don’t even think I’d be mad about the destination if she would have paid to go herself. It’s the combination of everything making me salty.
I was not taken on a me trip at any point in my life. 21 is actually around the time they all took their first family vacation together without me.
Maybe it’s petty but I just don’t have it in me to acknowledge their trip while they’re on it. They know I’m pretty hurt by this whole situation but I’ve also been kind and supportive where I’m able. I made them a Google map guide for photo ops, places to eat, and things to do. I’ve made my feelings clear without being snarky or rude about it. I just feel like that’s plenty and I shouldn’t have to offer more.
AITAH for ignoring them while they’re gone? Am I just being way too petty about this?