what I miss was never real
To the one I'll never forget,
I dreamed of you last night. You looked happy. I wish I could say I was happy for you, but a part of me still struggles with the fact that you've become a stranger in my life.
Every single day feels like a battle against the memories we left behind. No matter how hard I try to forget you, you never truly leave my mind. Somehow, you still find your way into my dreams.
I don't want you to be a part of me anymore. Yet whenever something reminds me of you, I can't help but wonder what it would feel like to hold your hand again, to stay by your side, to listen to you talk about your nerdy interests while I quietly sat there, watching the excitement sparkle in your eyes.
Then, for what feels like the thousandth time, I remind myself that I don't miss the real you. I miss the version of you I created in my mind, the one I loved, the one I believed in, and the one I hoped you were.
Maybe that is the hardest part. Letting go of someone who exists more vividly in my memories than they ever did in reality.