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The show opens with laughter as they fire up the video streams

Dick auditioned to be an egg for a sketch show

Johnny saw a fat person sitting on a car and the car moved when they stopped leaning on the car. Johnny now plans on getting a bumper sticker to keep people off his car.

AOC is single and froze her eggs

Dick and Johnny muse about moving to China to get out of alimony.

Dick disapproves of 80’s mom using Uber Eats.

Johnny went out for ice cream.

America’s wing man now advises the most important quality in a woman is to find the thriftiest one possible.

Dick was disappointed there weren’t elephants at the LA zoo

The masterson family went to the museum of natural history and his nuts hurt.

This was the first 30 minutes of the dick show I was able to listen to while on a lunch break.

Dick forgot what he was going to talk about and needs a beer. He’s going to drink whisky because he doesn’t want to get fatter.

The patron went up first time since Sean left, dick credits this to weight watchers and a bonus episode.

Dicks kid poops on him when dick brings the child to water.

Dick sat in a kiddy pool full of his son’s feces. His reasoning for not getting out right away is because he would get more poo on him. Dick called for help, 80’s mom and the dog came to the rescue.

Dick ripped his recently opened nut sack playing in the pool

Dick also went to the zoo

That’s the first 30 minutes of the show