Just dropped 230lbs of dead weight
I walked out on my partner 2.5 weeks ago and have since been staying with my parents until he moves out at the end of the month. It was my home before it was his. Long story short, he had a whole host of serious issues, namely substance abuse and dependency (alcohol and weed). The only time he was ever fully sober was while at work…enough said. The last few months were brutal. I nursed him through an Achilles tear, helped him navigate his way out of a toxic job…the list goes on. We stopped having sex, my bids for connection were chronically dismissed, I was living on the edge and broke when he tried to take off on a solo vacation without talking to me (which was something he had previously done). Enough was enough!
This relationship made me a secure and boundaried woman and I am so damn proud of myself. I feel it was the final boss of shitstorm relationships and I have this intuitive feeling my husband is right around the corner. I’m of course still grieving, but I’m clearer and feel more whole with each passing day. I turned 36 in April and while I spent months being worried I was too old to find love again, I’m no longer of that mind.
Now that I’ve taken my time and energy back, I am going to prioritize finances and friendships. Sadly my last remaining friend in my city recently moved. Oddly enough all my friends live out of province. But I’m committed to putting myself out there and making meaningful connections.
Just wanted to get this post out to cheer on anyone who might be in a similar position. We’ve got this :)