So this Happened....
Okay so I need to know if anyone else has experienced this because I genuinely feel like my vagina is haunted.
For the last like 3 years I’ve had recurring BV. I’d go to the gyno... get antibiotics... it would go away for like two seconds and then come right back. Finally one appointment my gyno is down there doing her thing and randomly goes “Do you have pets?”
And I’m like ??? yeah???
And she goes “You have what looks like a hairball attached to your IUD strings.”
A HAIRBALL.
Attached to my cervix jewelry.
So naturally I go home and google it because what the actual fuck and apparently it CAN happen. I guess the strings can collect hair and lint and fibers and become a tiny disgusting dust bunny of doom.
Fast forward to now. I’m with my boyfriend and every time he finishes in me the smell gets SO much worse. Like immediately. Boric acid helps but only temporarily so tonight we decided to investigate.
And yes before anyone says it... I know... this was probably stupid.
We bought a speculum off Amazon and I used it to look and SURE ENOUGH there is literally a giant hairball hanging off my IUD strings. This thing was way bigger than I expected too. Like peanut M&M sized.
So we’re both sitting there horrified staring at my cervix like it’s some kind of Discovery Channel special and then I go to take the speculum out.
Suddenly I get this horrible cramp and immediately freeze because I can FEEL something is wrong.
Then my boyfriend goes:
“OH MY GOD YOU GOT IT.”
I look down and the damn hairball is caught in the speculum.
Meaning I basically started accidentally ripping my IUD out via dusty cervix tumbleweed.
At this point I’m panicking because the speculum is basically attached to my uterus by way of hairylint knot so my boyfriend cuts the hairball off the strings while I’m sitting there trying not to throw up or pass away dramatically in my bathroom.
So now we have this weird little hairy cervix artifact sitting on the bathroom counter and instead of acting like mentally stable adults we start DISSECTING IT because I needed to know if both strings were caught in it or just one.
Because if it was only one string there’s a decent chance I yanked the IUD sideways and now it’s sitting in there all cockeyed.
But if both strings were attached then theoretically it got tugged more evenly and maybe it’s okay???
This is the level of scientific research happening in my bathroom tonight.
Anyway after we cut it free I checked again and there was a little blood around my cervix but the strings are still there and the pain stopped. So now I have to call my gyno tomorrow and explain that I almost accidentally removed my IUD because my vagina had a furball.
Also once we dissected the thing it literally looked like I emptied out a vacuum cleaner. Just fibers and hair.
Anyway pictures attached. If anyone else has experienced this please tell me.