My boyfriend (35M) woke me (34F) up at 5 am insisting he wasn't "the villain," and I don't know what to make of it
My boyfriend (35M) and I (34F) have been together for 8 months. Recently we went on a trip with some of his longtime friends.
Whenever they get together, they drink a lot and usually stay up until sunrise. I normally hang out with them too, but my grandfather had passed away the day before, so I wasn't really in the mood and went to bed early.
Apparently, after everyone got very drunk, one of his closest friends (B., 35F) brought up something that happened years ago. Whatever she said really upset him.
Around 5 a.m., he came to bed, woke me up, and started telling me that B. had told a story from their past in a way that made him "the villain." He kept insisting (over and over) that he was not the villain and that he completely disagreed with her version of events.
What struck me wasn't just what he was saying, but how he was acting. His voice was breaking, and his tone was completely unlike him. The best way I can describe it is that he sounded almost like an upset child. I don't mean that as an insult, it was just so out of character that it stood out.
Then things got even stranger. He kept saying I could ask him anything and that he'd answer honestly, but at the same time he refused to actually explain what had happened. It felt like he was saying, "If you can guess what I'm talking about, then I'll tell you," while giving me almost nothing to go on.
The whole interaction felt bizarre. I was tired, confused, and honestly starting to get irritated, so I decided not to push him while he was clearly drunk. I figured we'd talk about it once he sobered up.
The next day, though, he acted completely normal. His friends did too. Everyone just complained about their hangovers, and no one mentioned the conversation again.
I decided to let it go because I assumed it was just drunk drama. Also, I've done embarrassing things while drunk before, and I hate when people bring them up later, so I treated him the way I'd want to be treated.
But ever since that trip, he's been acting strangely whenever this particular group of friends comes up. He constantly says they love gossip, exaggerate everything, and twist stories just to create drama.
Now I'm wondering if he panicked because B. brought up whatever happened while they were sitting right outside the bedroom where I was sleeping. Part of me wonders whether he woke me up to see if I'd overheard anything while also trying to frame himself as the victim just in case I had. And now I can't stop wondering whether he's been trying to discredit his friends in case one of them tells me what actually happened.
I know that's a pretty big leap, and maybe I'm overthinking all of this. But the whole situation felt so odd that I haven't been able to shake it.
Am I being paranoid? Does this sound like something worth asking him about? And if so, how would you bring it up?
TL;DR: My boyfriend woke me up at 5 a.m. after drinking to repeatedly insist he wasn't "the villain" in a story his friend told, but refused to explain what actually happened. Since then, he's repeatedly called that friend group gossipers who twist stories. I'm struggling to figure out how to interpret this and how to approach a conversation about it without making unfair assumptions.