"And don't disappear when you feel inadequate."
i really liked alice's mic drop button in the diamond dogs + cat people fatherhood advice scene and how they took a moment to nudge us to understand how it applies to each person in the room;
for alice, it's a lesson she has quietly and repeatedly pushed herself through since before we've even met her. there are hints throughout the season that she feels inadequate now compared to how she felt as a player (most recent eg her instinctive handwaving at the dr that she's 'just gemma's coach' and pride at being called 'the great' as well). she never let herself disappear which we knew she felt like was happening after her injuries from her plea to rebecca about not letting gemma feel she was "disappearing in real time". she was tempted to disappear at the boat party when zelda shoved her aside without acknowledgement. she felt inadequate as a coach after suspension and her insecurities being aired to the girls but she didnt disappear and in the end she reaped the reward for that bravery.
roy as her direct analog from the original series fittingly also embodied this lesson this season. after disappearing on (ie breaking up with) keeley because he felt inadequate his whole arc was realising he had to acknowledge his own power and raise himself up to the pedestal he puts keeley on to be with her instead of casting himself as not worthy, which he was doing in s3 (which arc had been cooking since that 'woman on top' magazine didnt include him and he believed she was better on her own than him dragging her down).
ted needed to hear it because he was hiding the truth and a part of himself by lying to henry about his father's suicide and his own relationship to it because he was worried he wouldn't be able to give him enough reassurance, adequately account for the inevitable grief and confusion and make it all ok for his son. he was disappearing in his relationship to his son by withholding honesty and frankness and they reconnected when he committed to showing up.
beard feels inadequate after a series of misfortunes and humiliations all coalescing with his ageing mortal body and so he chooses to disappear into a jamie tartt disguise, concealing his real hair situation, eye colour, actual personal style etc but after this banger hits he allows himself to be freshened up by isaac and revealed in his bare glory.
nate he obviously disappeared from richmond because of his deep feelings of inadequacy he was trying to paper over by first going with rupert, then left coaching premier league football entirely bc at least partially he felt inadequate to the task when he had so much personal growth to do. now he's back visiting richmond after ages and sees they all are so happy to see him. and of course he's a new dad, always relevant to say and esp if there was a hinty-hint he might come back to be the men's manager on ted's rec.
higgins, ever the role model husband & father, fittingly demonstrated having taken on this lesson all the way back in the first season when he clearly felt morally inadequate for how he was complicit in deceiving rebecca and so chose, rather than disappear, to face her every day and try to be better.
quite nice hey! i do have a lot of critiques for this season but ultimately as long as it's a setup for s5 i'm happy bc that's the only way i can read it. tanya reynolds as alice chilton is the undisputable MVP of the season, all i wanted to see was more of her, and the final ep especially made it screamingly clear that the theme of this season was literally CHANGE IS GOOD