Why do I always get in trouble when I stand up for myself?
Whether it’s school or work or friendship I feel like eventually there’s always a point where drama goes down and I’m left alone (fired or excluded) and upset and angry at the way I was treated. I’m a woman and I know I can come across quite blunt and passionate about my opinions but I don’t think I’m unkind until my boundaries get pushed to an extreme. I can admit when I’m wrong and I do frequently but I don’t feel like I get the same treatment from others.
I find that I get really attached to people and then I get hurt and somehow by trying to resolve things I end up hurting them back. And then at work I get warnings or get fired.
The thing is, I like my assertiveness. It protects me and makes me feel confident. But I wonder if I’m actually being aggressive or stubborn without realizing it.
I’m just worried that the problem lies inherently in me and I’m not seeing it. I’ve been putting in a lot of work trying to be less abrasive in all of my relationships but this keeps happening.