potential on the spectrum
I’ve been talking to a potential for a couple months and I’m struggling to figure out if we’re emotionally compatible.
On paper he’s honestly great. He has a stable career, good family, deen-oriented, goes to the masjid/halaqas, works out. He’s also very introverted and keeps to himself.
But socially/emotionally I feel a disconnect sometimes. He doesn’t really pick up on emotional cues or unspoken things, and he can come across a little self-centered or unaware without intending to. Personality-wise he’s quirky and awkward at times. Nothing terrible, but sometimes I cringe a little lol.Another thing is that early on he told me he doesn’t believe in buying flowers/gifts or doing romantic gestures. In his mind, pursuing a woman is basically taking her on dates and paying for them. The issue is I I want emotional closeness. I want to feel pursued, considered, emotionally supported, surprised with flowers sometimes, checked on emotionally, etc. I want a husband who is emotionally available and naturally thoughtful.Part of me wonders if he might be neurodivergent/high-functioning autistic because of the social unawareness and rigid/thinking style. But I also don’t want to unfairly label him. Would it be wrong to bring up my emotional needs directly and see if he’s willing/capable of meeting them? Or am I ignoring compatibility issues that will become much bigger in marriage?