u/someones_pookie

I'm writing this on my lunch break on my second account because I didnt wanted to get doxed and I also need to put it somewhere before I lose the feeling.

Three months ago I was a shell. I'd wake up already tired, scroll for an hour, "relieve" myself out of boredom before I even got out of bed, then drag myself through a day I couldn't remember by the time I got home. Rinse, repeat. I told myself I was fine. I wasn't fine.

The first two weeks were hell. I'm not going to sugarcoat that. My brain screamed at me. Every notification, every ad, every scroll session was a landmine. I deleted Instagram on day 4. Twitter on day 6. I bought a dumb alarm clock so my phone wouldn't be next to my bed. Small stuff. It added up.

Week 3 something shifted. I woke up before my alarm. I actually WANTED to go for a walk. I called my mom for no reason. My coworker asked if I'd started working out because I "looked different." I hadn't. My face just wasn't puffy from 4 hours of sleep and dopamine poisoning anymore.

Day 45 I asked a girl at the coffee shop for her number. She said yes. Three months ago I couldn't make eye contact with the cashier.

Day 60 I got a promotion I'd been passed over for twice. My boss said I "seemed more present in meetings." I was. Because my brain wasn't fried by the time I got to work.

Day 90 is today. I'm not going to tell you it's easy. I still get urges. I still have bad days. But I have a LIFE now. I have hobbies I actually enjoy instead of half-doing while waiting for the next hit. I read 6 books this quarter. I couldn't finish an article three months ago.

If you're on day 1 reading this , I know you don't believe me. I didn't believe the day 90 posts either. Just make it to day 14. That's all. Everything changes at day 14.

You are not your urges. You are what you choose when the urges show up.

Stay strong, brothers. See you at 180. AMA for any more questions