u/thebaddestofall

There’s this guy that has been trying to text back and forth with me but honestly you guys I’m just up for texting at the time idk why but I’m feeling overwhelmed with my phone and messages in general that I don’t have the mental capacity to respond. I literally just see the messages and leave them there and I’ve even been bad with getting back to my boss whenever he sends me a msg abt work 😭 but I’m trying to find a nice a way to tell this guy to stop texting me and that I’m just not feeling in the mood to txt. The worst part of it all is that we do work together and we have shifts together 😭 I know he has a crush on me but tbh I don’t wanna lead him that way because I’m not interested either. Oh and btw we’re both gay men 😂😂😂 just needed to put that out there

So I need outside perspective on a situation with someone I genuinely care about because I feel emotionally stuck right now.

A few months ago I met this guy (Capricorn) (I am a Scorpio btw), and we instantly clicked. The connection felt really natural and emotionally intimate. We would hangout , joke around, open up about personal stuff, and there was this comfort between us that honestly felt rare. He was very affectionate emotionally, would ask vulnerable questions, compliment me, and sometimes be flirtatious in ways that blurred lines for me.

Eventually I admitted that I liked him and the only reason I did that was because he would always find some way to tell me to express my feelings because I would never know if the other person was waiting on me and to me that felt like he was hinting at me to just say it so he would feel more comfortable to say it too, I told him I wasn’t looking for anything sexual and that I’d honestly be okay staying platonic because I value the connection itself more than anything else and he told me that he liked me too and enjoyed my company but was only attracted to women but the possibility of him liking guys wasn’t out the window just as of now the way his brain was working he wasn’t attracted to men.

At one point he even asked me things like “Do I come off like I like guys?” and “Did I say or do anything that made you think I was into guys?” which added even more confusion because the dynamic already felt emotionally intense.

The problem is that I also have a habit of shutting down emotionally when I get scared of being hurt or abandoned. Instead of calmly communicating, I started spiraling internally and making weird self-protective comments. One of the biggest ones was me saying something like “we’re probably not getting renewed for a season 2 anyway” which basically implied the connection was doomed or ending. Looking back, I think that probably hurt and confused him a lot.

After our last hangout, I could tell the energy shifted. I apologized for shutting down and for the comments I made because I realized I was projecting my fears onto him instead of just trusting the connection. His response was basically: “I’m not ignoring your message, I’m just taking time to process and thoughtfully respond.”

Since then we really haven’t talked.

The hard part is I genuinely don’t think he’s a bad person. I actually think he handled everything with honesty, care, and emotional maturity. I just think I overwhelmed the situation emotionally and maybe made him feel pressure or uncertainty. Now I’m sitting here wondering if I damaged something that could’ve still existed platonically if I had handled my emotions better.
Is this how a Capricorn says they’re done with you?