u/thereisno_tomorrow

Just found out, my old coworker showed me texts, of recently MM talking to her sending her pics of his office ( it’s more like an apartment the way he designs it in one of his buildings) where he slyly made comments about her getting used to what it looks like so she can come down there. I know what happens in his “office”. I’m disgusted because he had told me he would never try to have an affair again and specifically would never try with this specific girl. I love this girl actually, but he’s such a liar lol. So many guys act like they aren’t that guy who tries to get with anyone and everyone, but they are!!! This just helps me see him more clearly and I don’t care. I am just disgusted I fell for it with him.

I mean, honestly. I think most MM’s are losers. Very insecure inside. Deeply unhappy. Of course I know this isn’t everyone but it seems to be quite a few and through reading this sub, a lot of the stories end the same way.

When I look back at my situation, I see how I was delusional and blind for the first few months, was starting to not care, but then ended up working for him and that’s when everything became SO SO much worse. I uncovered things about MM that I had no clue about prior to entering the affair (addictions, rumored pasts with other women, etc) You think you know someone and then…

I can’t tell you how many times promises fell through or double standards were put against me. I had to live up to an expectation that was completely unfair.

When I looked back at this affair, a lot of it was really about control. Control of me and to have power over me and my emotions so that he could check off all the areas in his life so to speak. “If I can get her to fulfill my sexual need then I need to do this to make it happen. “- are serious subconscious thoughts that I think were in his mind based on countless times I look back and see how I was guilted and manipulated through actions and words of his. Not to mention the power and coercive control he had over me in the workplace. I was really screwed and my hands were tied, and yes ultimately got burned (fired from job, but is is a blessing in disguise I know)

Not to mention how I would see him do this in real time with other people, and how calculated he could be, it was like second nature to him as a sales person in business entrepreneur.

I don’t really know where I go from here or what the point of this all is, but I’m just trying to forgive myself and move forward and move past the anger and hurt. I do feel a lot of relief but I think I’m just angry at the fact that he had power over me and I felt like I didn’t have the ability to make the choices that I wanted to make. He did not have my back at the end of the day and admitted that he had failed me and I told him to leave me alone. He has done nothing and added no good to my life and really just caused pain and hurt. Bringing me to the workplace was stupid on both our accounts but he could have easily transitioned me to another role and instead let me be let go. In the end they look out for themselves. Remember that!

Well, I’m back with another update.

Fast forward to now.

I have been let go (for no damn reason) at my job with MM. He actually had the power to not let me go but surprise surprise did not protect me and used excuses like “it would’ve blown up the whole business”. And “I couldn’t do anything”, “there was no other solution” ummm yes there was, but for the sake of not giving too much detail I will just say I could have been moved to a different position easily and he had the power to make that happen.

I was really hurt by this and in fact for me, it was less about the job but more about the social circle that I formed there. Now I do have another job, which is my main focus, but the second job was really good for me in the social aspect, not so good because of my history with MM so I guess you could say this is a blessing in disguise but right now I feel isolated and alone, and angry that people with power somehow always seem to come out on top.

I expressed my anger to him, and he admitted that he failed me, but if you know anything about my post, you know that he immediately goes back-and-forth on everything and his moods are like shifting tides. And I swear he says things to get under my skin and deliberately hurt me at this point. I told him I was lonely and he told me all the coworkers were out the one night without me. I told him I was still upset about losing the job and he talked to me about a woman who should’ve been fired instead of me, and claiming that she was still there when he told me he was going to get rid of her!

It’s just ridiculous after everything putting up with him feeding me Bullshit lies about his marriage and dead bedroom situation and then magically getting his wife pregnant. Which he had the twins by the way and I was still as neutral as I could be about it and even gave him support at times.

I think I can do this because I truly didn’t want to be in any sort of entanglement with him anymore, and for a while at the job, I felt like I was trapped and had no choice in order to keep my job if I’m being honest to that part of it was actually terrible for my mental health.

he’s Selfishly expected me to stay loyal to him while he can have the benefit benefits in the life of family all while I suffer in silence. I just can’t wrap my head around the selfishness of these people truly and how they justified in their minds.

Looking back at this I am disgusted with myself. I need to move on and heal from this. He tried to contact me the other day, and I answered the call and just ended up feeling angry and worse after because he says the dumbest shit ever. Not to mention just the push and pull he constantly did to me and trying to flirt with me and get back with me.

It’s just disgusting honestly, and the more I look at this situation as a hole and I look at him as a hole I see a definite pattern of manipulation, mood swings, addictions that I found out about, immaturity, and a God complex. Him and his business partner act very similarly and can’t take accountability for anything.

I have no interest in talking to him at this point because I’m so sick of these antics that he pulls.

It truly breaks my heart to think of all the women in here caught up and enthralled with their situation, I think I was maybe briefly for like a month or two.

I would just plead and beg all these women here to just never put yourself in this type of situation because these men are usually more often and then not selfish, manipulative, and narcissistic. I could write endless paragraphs about things he did that were just absolutely bullshit and I feel like I was treated so unfairly but at the end of the day, I just want to move on and never speak to him again because it really adds no benefit to my life. He honestly just made things worse for me in alot of ways. I will be better off without him manipulating me and my emotions.

He also has a tiny dick. Lol