AITK for crushing over my senior cop
Lil context about me-
I am 25M, single and im a cop (in a state police).. I am on a pretty decently respectable post. The region where im posted is quite primitive and the crime rate is pretty low here, so we dont have a lot of work to do.
story starts here
so this one fine day i get notified by my senior that an officer has been transferred here. Lets call that officer X. X is female about the same age as me.. and she is an IPS officer. This was her punishment posting. I was given the responsibility to manage and help to help her accommodate and shift here. Since I was not a local, I lived in the government quarter. So i had fair connections with people around there, in terms of power as well as in social terms.
so the day comes, I bought a bouquet and me along with 2 others went to receive her from the nearest airport ( it was 4-5 hours away from our posting). that was the first time i saw her. That was literally the love at first site. NOTHING ELSE. I handed over the bouquet to her and we did all the formalities and it was just me and her, I was taking her to the govt quarters, where I also lived.
she was a nice person, always polite, helpful, her light brown eyes- I can just look at them forever. She had a charisma, she was like a magnet that attracted me.
*leap*
some time passes, a few months, we became quite good friends? i dont know if friends would be the right word.. she was extremely happy this one day. she tells me that her boyfriend was coming here for the week. I WAS DEVISTATED. I HAD NO IDEA SHE HAD A BOYFRIEND. BUT IT WAS TOO LONG TO UNLOVE HER.
well~ her bf comes, he was a sort of a guy for which every girl will fall for. handsome, tall, rich.
alright, so her bf and she were staying at her govt quarter ofc.. It was that one morning i had to meet her, to get her signatures on some important documents.. So I went to her quarter, It was basically a 1BHK flat, she takes longer than usual to open the door and i could sense some awkwardness.
She was wearing her bf's shirt without a bra- i could see it.. Her bf was sleeping on the couch, almost naked? and there were packets of condoms lying around. I HAD NEVER FELT THAT SORT OF EMOTIONS- RAGE, LOVE, ANGER, JEALOUSY AND IDK WHAT.
she looked awkward, i was awkward too . I sat and handed her the docs while her bf was giving me an eye. I knew he was as jealous of me as i was from him. He came and kissed her. I was so enraged, that I left abruptedly . I even gooned while seeing her pics. But i genuinly loved her.
THE FINAL DAY
ok so it was last week, when she was finally leaving.. I drove her to the airport, it is monsoon and it was raining heavily.. we sat in car for about 20 mins.. reflection on "us", she was feeling bitttersweet, i couldnt control and i just kissed her. She didnt engage in it but she didnt opposed it either. she just stared at me. with her light brown eyes. that was the last time i saw her. she still has bf. and i still love her.
I am confused , did i do the right thing, or did i not? Am I The Kameena??