I (55F) found out why my autistic son (32M) wants to move out, even though he has always said he never wanted to
Title: I (55F) found out why my autistic son (32M) wants to move out, even though he has always said he never wanted to
Well, like the title says, my son is 32. He has never even thought about moving out and has always wanted to live with me. I'm fine with that. He pays me $900 a month in rent, and he needs help with a lot of things. He does have a job, though.
He got a girlfriend three years ago. She recently moved out of her parents' house, and now he wants to move in with her.
It was crazy to me because he is afraid of change, and basically, I've always done everything for him. He wanted to move out as soon as she moved out of her parents' house, but I told him no because I didn't think he was ready. Honestly, I still don't think he is.
Now he's saying that he is moving out by December and that he has given me enough notice. I was completely blown away. I never thought he would do something like this without her. She has changed him so much.
I know he is 32, but he has lived in my house for so long, and I never expected him to be in a relationship this long. Technically, this is his first real relationship.
Don't get me wrong, I am happy for him. So I went over to his girlfriend's apartment to see what it was like. It was clean, not cluttered, and quiet. Her roommate is her sister, who mostly keeps to herself.
His girlfriend cooks amazing food. She even makes things he doesn't normally like, and he actually eats them when she cooks. She cleans, has even started booking his doctor's appointments, takes him to work, and goes grocery shopping by herself.
She is an amazing person, and I'm happy he found someone who understands his autism.
She never gets mad at him. One time, she was cooking dinner but had to leave for two hours. She told him, "I set a timer for the chicken. When the timer goes off, turn it off and just leave it in the oven."
She came back, and he had literally just turned off the timer. The chicken got burnt. All she said was, "It's okay. Next time, I'll explain myself better."
Honestly, she seems perfect for him.
I'm okay with him moving in with her. I think I'm finally realizing that maybe this is what growing up looks like for him, even if it's really hard for me to accept.