Should I get rid of my chip?
I graduated from a month long in patient rehab about 2 years ago, and upon leaving they gave me a coin for completing the program. Kinda like an AA 30 day chip. A few months after graduation I relapsed and began drinking heavily and regularly up until about a month ago. I haven't had a drink in probably over a month but I've smoked weed in that time.
Tonight is one of my give it all up nights. I have no more weed and decided enough is enough and I am going to cut out everything except for nicotine for the time being. And I would even like to give that up. Last week I had 3 days off of it but fell down.
Anyway, I'm sitting here tonight alone in my apartment staring at that rehab chip wondering if I deserve it anymore and if not how to dispose of it. I really enjoyed my time at that rehab center and I met some really great and supportive people there. My last day before giving me the chip everyone passed it around the room to give it some "good luck". I've kept it on me in my wallet every day since then but it is beginning to feel like stolen valor.
Thoughts? Thank you for taking the time to read my post.