The one thing I wished I learned earlier as a dad and husband
I’m not a great writer but really think this can help many dads (husbands). When I was becoming a dad, my biggest worry was how do i change a diaper lol
Three kids in, and I can tell you the diapers and the sleep stuff sorted themselves out faster than I expected. The part that nearly took me out was my marriage.
“You never do anything around here”
“Everything falls on me”
Have you heard those sentences while doing your best to juggle work, taking care of the kids, and being a supportive partner? I used to get so freaking frustrated when my wife would say this because I felt like I was doing plenty. I would wake up first with the kids, play with them, get ready for work, work, play with them after dinner, and then I get yelled at how I wasn’t helping.
At first I thought that was an unfair criticism towards me and that resulted in both of us being defensive, not listening to each other, and just telling our side of the story.
We got to the truth after one sleepless night of arguing and I realized that she meant I wasn’t helping with the things SHE ACTUALLY WANTED help with, not the things I wanted to help. She wanted to have time with the kids and have me put in a load of laundry, she wanted to take 30 minutes and go shopping alone instead of me bringing the things home.
To go further into this, look up the 5 love languages and figure out what your and her love language are. everyone has a love language and my love language is affection. My wife’s love language is acts of service. I needed to be there for her the way she needs it. Once i figured that out, everything got a lot easier. I couldn’t do everything but i would find time in mg day to wash the dishes or clean up the toys, anything that could help alleviate her load.