how long is too long to wait for a text back?
my best friend moved abroad a year ago for a job. she was always notoriously bad at texting and hated phone calls (had bad phone anxiety) but since we were in the same city it was ok- we just hung out in person.
before she left i told her i was nervous we would never speak cause of her texting habits and she assured me she would try calling and stay on top of it. the first 2 weeks we called once and then it went radio silent until she came home at the holidays. she said she got overwhelmed with everyone trying to get ahold of her to catchup and just went ghost on everyone. I said i understand but that it did hurt my feelings to reach out with no response, especially since im not asking for anything crazy - just a call every few weeks or a text here and there.
i told her that i wouldn’t text her first anymore because it was hurting my feelings to be left on delivered, but anytime she wants to call or text i am ready to go.
she then got into a habit where she’d text me something like “hey how was the first week at your new job”, i would answer immediately and then… no response. rinse and repeat once a month. i think we called maybe 3 times the last 6 months and that was at my persistent hounding as we needed to plan a trip for our friends bachelorette. I know it not just me, all of our mutual friends have barely heard from her.
i’m just at a loss… how hard is it to send a text? is it not rude to ask someone how they are and then not even bother reading the response? especially someone you consider a “best friend”. Do I even bother bringing this up again or just let this become someone i only wish happy birthday to? I’m so sad because I love her so much but i don’t know how to be okay with a friend who puts in what feels like 0 effort?