UPDATED: YOU CAN HEAR THE BOOS: (It's from X, only place I've found it):

https://x.com/premrugby/status/2108667464209006919

UPDATE #2: Harold's arrival. Note the SeCurITAY:
https://x.com/premrugby/status/2108643461222003095

From the Express:

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Prince Harry stepped out this evening to watch a rugby union match. The Duke of Sussex made a low-key appearance at Welford Road this evening, to watch Leicester Tigers clash with Gloucester. However, not all fans appeared happy to see the royal among other members of the public, as he was greeted with boos by some of the fans in the stands after he was shown on the big screen. Harry was papped taking his seat with a bear in his hand. His appearance comes shortly after he moved back to Britain with his family. And the paps JUST happened to be there. Gonna regret that, Harold.

TNT Sports made mention of awkward reception in their live blog. They wrote: "There were boos inside Welford Road as Prince Harry was shown on the big screen. No the boos weren’t for Ugo Monye as the TNT pundits joked."

Archive: https://archive.ph/HUElu

Now, for the Hello version:

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Prince Harry had a guys' night out on Friday evening. The Duke of Sussex attended the rugby match between Leicester Tigers and Gloucester Rugby at Mattioli Woods Welford Road Stadium in Leicester.

King Charles' younger son was dressed down, wearing blue jeans and a black puffer jacket, for the match, where he was photographed in the stands with a drink, seemingly a beer, in hand. 

While his older brother, Prince William, is an avid football fan, the Duke prefers rugby. A source has told HELLO!: "For Harry it's all about rugby over football." Oh Harold, PUH-LEEZ. William and Catherine are both rugby fans, and both Prince George and Princess Charlotte play as well. Harold, you're no Mike Tindall and you never will be!!!

Harry previously served as patron of the Rugby Football Union and Rugby Football League, roles his sister-in-law, the Princess of Wales*, has since taken over. The Duke relinquished the patronages, along with others, in 2021 after* he and Meghan confirmed to the late Queen Elizabeth that they would not return as working members of the royal family. 

While it's unclear who the Duke was supporting on Friday, there is one team the dad of two would like to have his children, Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet, get behind.

"Harry says Archie and Lilli support Northampton and he’s looking forward to the day that he can take them to a match once his security situation is sorted. He says it's one hurdle at a time," a source told HELLO!. SE-CUR-I-TAY is his excuse for being a lousy parent and not taking his kids anywhere.

Harry's outing on Friday night came just a few days after his wife Meghan was spotted in London, marking her first public sighting in the British capital since returning to the UK in late August. The Duchess of Sussex was seen on Wednesday at Claridge's hotel with Nobel Peace Prize laureate Malala Yousafzai.

"None of this is low-key. And this is why I think this whole move is quite extraordinary," ***HELLO!'*s Royal Editor Emily Nash remarked on HELLO!'s A Right Royal podcast. "Lest we forget, back in June, when Harry came back to the UK, he said it wasn't safe for him to bring his wife and children to the capital. So they did come to the UK and they stayed outside of London. What has changed to make Meghan come back?" 

"She's there in central London and it's one thing to be discreetly spotted at the table. But then she was photographed coming out in some very elegant clothing with Malala. It may not be her responsibility at all that that has happened, but what's changed? They must be confident that they are either having or about to have some better security, perhaps? Intriguingly, it seems to deviate from what we were told just a couple of months back."

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Hello archive: https://archive.ph/iALP1

Mirror version:

Prince Harry was seen in the stands watching a rugby game with a beer this evening - and received a mixed reception from the crowd. The Duke of Sussex appeared in a relaxed mood watching Leicester Tigers as they faced Gloucester at Welford Road, despite some boos ringing out from fans when he was spotted.

As Harry was shown on the big screen taking his seat with a beer in hand, there were some jeers from the crowd

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I don't know who this guy is, but damn, his face says it all.

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Mirror archive: https://archive.ph/EpIc9

And, As ever, it's all about HIM. (My comments in bold).

Prince Harry virtually addressed the NATO Military Committee this week, speaking about his experience in serving and how it helped inspire him to start the Invictus Games.

Speaking via videoconference to the committee’s headquarters in Brussels, the Duke of Sussex, 42, opened his remarks by thanking them for welcoming him back after a previous video appearance in October 2024.

“A great deal has changed since then. But what has not changed is the common ground between NATO and Invictus — and my belief that there is far more we can do together,” he said. “Because at its heart, NATO is an alliance of nations. But those nations are defended by people. People who volunteer to serve. People who train together, deploy together, fight together and in many cases, recover together. And families who serve alongside them in ways that are rarely acknowledged. And ultimately, people who come home.” Because nothing says you care like grifting off veterans and exploiting their families.

Prince Harry noted that, for as many resources are spent sending men and women to war, there are far fewer waiting for them on the other side of their service.

“I know something about that transition,” he recalled. “When I hung up my uniform, I felt as though I had lost not simply a profession, but part of my purpose and identity.” Well, seeing as you spent your time playing Xbox in a bunker and (allegedly) beating up sex workers, I can see how that would happen.

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Damn, Xbox Boy is looing rough.

The Duke of Sussex notekd that he was “fortunate” in that he had “another way to serve” as a member of the royal family, and he said he started the Invictus Games to help others “find their way forward.” Bunker Boy, the only thing you're giving is migraines.

“Invictus is not a sporting event,” Harry said. “Sport is one of our tools. Our mission is much bigger. We rebuild purpose. We rebuild confidence. We strengthen families and communities. We connect veterans back into society. And increasingly, we connect nations so they can learn from each other about recovery, rehabilitation, mental health and life after service.” In fairness, Invictus is NOT a sporting event. It's a money laundering grift-a-thon that puts the veterans last and exploits the families and their communities. Canada, release the unredacted financials!

Prince Harry stressed to NATO leaders that it is particularly important to support veterans who have been injured or wounded during their military service, as they may struggle with the same feelings of purposelessness that he did after leaving the Army.

“They may never wear the uniform again. But they can still lead. They can still serve. They can still strengthen their community and their country. And they can become some of the most credible role models we have — particularly for the next generation. That is character built from service. Values embedded in one’s blood. The only values imbedded in your blood are those of your uncle: lie, exploit, grift, leave destruction as your monument.

“That is the Invictus Spirit,” he continued. “We are building a global movement that can turn the experience of wounded, injured and sick service personnel and their families into stronger communities, better systems and more resilient nations.” Yeah, and your "global movement" is going into schools so you can put six cameras in the face of a child and act like a gerbil on crack.

Prince Harry went on to introduce two fellow veterans and Invictus leaders, who also addressed the military committee: Chief Programmes and Strategy Officer David Wiseman and Deputy CEO Richard Smith.

Admiral Giuseppe Cavo Dragone, Chair of the NATO Military Committee, thanked Prince Harry and the Invictus team in a post on X following their remarks.

“After having met them recently in Kyiv, I was once again struck by their clear vision and genuine commitment to those who have carried the heaviest burden of service,” he wrote. “#NATO and Invictus share values of community, respect and belonging. Our veterans’ commitment does not end when the uniform comes off, and neither should our support. No soldier fights alone, and no veteran should recover alone.” You know what pisses me off here: Ukrainians are genuinely suffering. I read last night that that the Loving Hearts animal shelter in Odessa was bombed and 10 cats and three dogs died. How about serving some of those Ingriftus funds to help rebuild?

The rest is just a rehash.

Archive: https://archive.ph/blJnp

As always, take it with a grain of salt:

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have reportedly been keeping a record of their correspondence with Buckingham Palace since their return to the UK. A source claimed that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are doing so for their own "protection". The insider told Closer magazine: "Meghan and Harry don’t want to react to every problem, but they say they’ve learned the hard way that they need to keep a record of what’s being said and agreed to by people within The Firm, because the goal posts constantly change."

They added the Sussexes "say the only way to keep track properly is to catalogue and save everything". It comes after the Palace withdrew an offer for Harry to stay at a royal residence during a trip to Britain in the summer. Buckingham Palace insisted the Duke had not accepted the invitation in time.

The Sussexes were reportedly "a little bit surprised" after The Firm sent officials a letter clarifying that Harry and Meghan remain non-working members of the Royal Family.

Archive: https://archive.ph/20O9N

This may be nothing, but the timing is intriguing. From Richard Eden:

This is serendipitous. Yesterday, I disclosed that the Prince of Wales was considering appearing in a television documentary to mark the 30th anniversary of his late mother Princess Diana’s death.

Now, I learn that Prince William held private talks at Kensington Palace yesterday with the new Director-General of the BBC, Matt Brittin.

On the 20th anniversary of his mother’s death in 2017, William appeared with his brother, Prince Harry, in the same BBC documentary – Diana, Our Mother: Her Life And Legacy. That won’t happen again given the brothers’ estrangement. Harry is planning to make his own programme, probably for US streaming giant Netflix. I know which one I would rather watch.

Aw, is Harry sending a message to Nacho of what he's missing?

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Saw this on X (Unable to download):

https://x.com/that_1/status/2101124974421447067/video/1

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Ending your day with a laugh. I think this writer had some of Harry's mushrooms (oops, organic fungi) while writing this gem.

Meghan Markle is reportedly feeling defeated after receiving what a source described as a notably cold reception from the royal family following her move back to the U.K. with Prince Harry.

The Duchess of Sussex, 45, and Harry, 41, recently relocated from Montecito to the Cotswolds with their children, Archie, 7, and Lilibet, 5. But according to an insider, the couple has yet to receive the warm welcome Markle had hoped for from King Charles III and other members of the royal family.

Charles hot-footed it off to Scotland when they arrived which didn’t exactly send a warm welcome,” the source claimed to Closer.

"She wasn’t expecting a tea party or anything official, but it would’ve been nice to have some sort of signal from Charles that he was happy to have his son and grandchildren back in town," they added.

The insider alleged that the actress has received kind messages from other people, including members of the Spencer family, but still feels there has been little indication that she and Harry are truly welcomed by those within the King’s circle.

“She says it seems pretty clear that they’re going to have to fight for every single bit of face time with His Majesty and anyone else in his orbit,” the source said, adding, “It’s what Meghan expected but it’s still a huge disappointment because Harry has been promising her it would be so much different.”

Archive: https://archive.ph/rkwF1#selection-685.0-689.69

Badly lit optical illusion, where the spoon is standing straight up in the slop jar. We all know it's runny as hell, so it's obviously fake. The darkly lid croissant looks just foreboding.

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Meanwhile, the wine ain't selling, As ever.

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I went onto Chris Baron Smith's account since I saw he had a new reel. It mentions World Suicide Prevention Day (because why should William & Catherine get all the publicity), some old Invictus footage, plus this: gotta sell those tickets!!! But oh...why doesn't it include a link for ticket sales? As ever, Harold's an idiot.

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Privacy seeking private individuals tell publication their kids are in school. But what about SeCurITAY???

Highlights and my snarky comments:

Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet have started a new chapter in Britain — in the classroom.

The children of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle — 7-year-old Archie and 5-year-old Lilibet — are beginning the new school year in the U.K. after their family’s move back to Harry’s home country. The children were due to begin school in Britain in September, though details surrounding the family’s new home and their school are being kept private. But let's tell People anyway. So what if it makes the #Invisikids targets?

Settling the children “has been, and remains, their focus. Everything else will fall into place when the time is right,” a source close to Harry and Meghan tells PEOPLE. Sure, Jan.

“There is a lot to do. They have just moved halfway across the world, and it’s been really busy getting the kids settled,” the source adds. “Their focus has been on that, and will remain on that, for the time being. They are happy to be back.” They were happy to be back before the King bitchsmacked them with his letter.

The children’s schooling also played a role in the decision to relocate. A source close to Harry previously told PEOPLE that returning to Britain was something he had been “thinking about for a while,” while another source says the Duke wants his children “to understand the world he grew up in and where their family comes from.” So, the rumors that the Feds were closing in on his Visa applications are no big deal!

For Meghan, part of the appeal is what Britain can offer the children. “Meghan feels very fortunate that they’re able to give Archie and Lilibet the opportunity to experience both worlds,” a Montecito insider told PEOPLE. And Meghan can go back to her world in Montecito.

Last year, Meghan shared some tips for easing the transition of going back to school after summer break with PEOPLE, from surprising children with a handwritten note to asking kids about their “rose” and “thorn” over dinner. Rose: we get to spend some time away from mom and dad. Thorn: we hae to come back home.

She suggested, “Nestle a sweet something (not suggesting candy) into their backpack on the first Friday back to school. The first week can have a lot of big feelings, and a little nod to let them know you see them is so special. Try a tiny pack of stickers, a funny photo of your family, or an unexpected surprise like something you used to find in a Cracker Jack box.” And don't forget to write them one email a day since you'll have the nannies doing all this while you're day drinking at Soho House!

Archive: https://archive.ph/cmfWp

OMG, the snark is divine. My favorite parts are in bold.

Surprised?’ What do the Duke and Duchess of Sussex mean, exactly, by ‘surprised’?

Only two people with the self-awareness of a cabbage could fail to see that they left the King with very little choice but to set out the terms and conditions of their return in uncompromisingly clear language.

If you ask me, they’ve got off lightly. The King’s letter, sent to Prince Harry’s team, government departments, military officials and Lord Lieutenants in which (among other things) he states in no uncertain terms that they are simply ‘private citizens with commercial and charitable interests’ and that their HRH titles are ‘in abeyance’, is really no more than a judicious and long-overdue slap on the wrist.

Grateful’ would have been a more appropriate response. After all, a few hundred years ago they’d have been carted off to the Tower. If Prince Philip were still alive, they probably would have been, God bless him.

As it is, if you repeatedly stab someone in the back, slag off their wife, mock their entire existence and everything they stand for and generally do your best to trash their – and your – family’s entire reputation, what else do you expect? A hero’s return? Red carpet reception? A firework display? Come on.

Given everything, therefore, I’d say the King has been pretty restrained. His statement was a masterclass in ‘kingly statecraft’, as my colleague Richard Kay put it so eloquently.

Yet the fact that Charles III even felt the need to put pen to parchment so publicly speaks volumes about how estranged father and son have become, and how far their relationship has deteriorated. They are like a divorcing couple who are now only communicating through their lawyers. Or, in this case, courtiers.

King Charles could very easily have issued this communiqué in private. The fact that he did not shows he simply doesn’t trust his son not to twist his words and intentions, as he has done on countless occasions over the past few years.

It shows that the King has finally run out of patience for his indulged youngest child. And not before time.

Besides, it’s good to see these two finally getting a taste of their own medicine. Harry and Meghan seem to enjoy nothing more than pulling the rug from under people’s feet, as we have seen time and again, first with that dreadful Oprah interview, most recently with the announcement of their return to Britain.

They love to blindside, all the better to create a stir, and to put their opponents (or those they perceive as their opponents) on the back foot.

Indeed, we are told that the King had no inkling of their decision to abandon California for the Cotswolds until the Sunday before the announcement. There were many who doubted that was possible; the formal nature of this communiqué is the clearest indication that it was in fact true.

Their short-sighted and tone-deaf response to it shows there is very little prospect of an imminent rapprochement. (If these two had half a grain of common sense between them or their advisers), they would have realised this statement was the perfect opportunity to extend an olive branch. They could have responded with grace and diplomacy and won plaudits for doing so.

Perhaps something along the lines of, ‘We would like to reassure His Majesty that we understand the terms of the arrangement and have every intention of respecting them’.

Maybe even a ‘we are grateful for his understanding at this difficult time’. But no.

Instead, they chose to react in typically petulant fashion. ‘Surprised’, aka rather miffed, once again betraying the complete and utter lack of self-knowledge these two possess when it comes to the damage they have caused, and the mountain they have to climb in terms of redeeming their reputation not just in the mind of the King, but also the general public.

Bottom line, not many people like them, and even fewer people want them here.

The public are not exactly putting out the bunting; according to one poll, 87 per cent of Brits think they should pay for their own security. America, as Donald Trump pointed out, is relieved to be shot of them.

None of this has anything to do with race or class or jealousy, or the way they have been framed by the media. They’ve managed this all by themselves, through their own direct actions and by repeatedly and consistently showing themselves to be not very nice people.

While they were still in the royal fold, they were at least partially protected from their own stupidity (and cupidity). Left to their own devices, it has been one PR disaster after another.

It’s not just their unerring lack of consideration over the years for the feelings of their family at difficult and traumatic moments such as the death of Prince Philip and the late Queen, whose final months were tormented by their selfish behaviour, or the way they added to the King and Prince William’s anguish at a time of great personal difficulty.

It’s also the whiff of high-handedness and general arrogance that follows them wherever they go, from that executive at Spotify who described them as ‘f****** grifters’ to the allegations of intimidation and bullying from junior members of Kensington Palace staff.

And then, of course, there are all the millions of pounds – money that it would take most people several lifetimes to earn – wasted on legal battles pursuing spurious claims against the Home Office and blameless journalists, many of whom have had their lives and reputations shredded to satisfy the egos of this vacuous pair.

Truth is, wherever Harry and Meghan go, trouble swiftly follows. So you really can’t blame the King for wanting to set some clear boundaries. Arguably, he should have done this a long time ago – but then, as a father, he probably never imagined the lengths and depths his youngest child would sink to in his quest for... what?

What exactly has been the point of the past six years? Revenge? Closure? Point-scoring?

The Duke and Duchess’s foreign sojourn has been nothing but a prolonged and very expensive exercise in self-indulgence, on all fronts. For all the misty-eyed Instagram reels of the duchess frolicking fragrantly in her garden, they’re clearly just as dissatisfied as they always were – or why else would they be coming back?

No doubt they will be treated like royalty by the fawning school-run mums and Soho House sycophants they will surround themselves with in the Cotswolds.

But this is not La-La Land any more, this is 21st-century Britain, where people have very little time for spoilt, entitled brats like Harry. If he wants the keys to his father’s kingdom back, he and his wife had better get in line.

Archive: https://archive.ph/ULA7G#selection-1911.0-1915.231

I wonder how much she'll charge for this crime against liquid. And look, it's fancy because she uses French!!!

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Gotta get rid of the booze, so let's gift it to "friends":

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Dear God, the building up of Doria as some kind of saint is insane. Are they that desperate for good PR, or is something bad about Doria going to come out???

(I'm leaving out the parts we already know about). Here are the highlights (with my snarky comments)

********************
She's been their emotional support 'rock' and fellow Californian for the past six years.

So it's no doubt that Doria Ragland will be missing her daughter, son-in-law and two grandchildren as they move across the ocean just as she turns 70 next week. (Of course she will...what's left of Doria's PR is going with them).

Meghan's mother has been a constant presence in the family's life since the Duke and Duchess of Sussex stepped down as senior royals and relocated to the US in 2020. (Yeah, so constant that she disappeared for years while Meghan was growing up).

She lives in a bungalow in a wealthy residential district outside the centre of Los Angeles, under a two-hour drive away from her daughter's Montecito mansion. 

With the couple set to move to the UK and enroll Archie, seven, and Lilibet, five, in English school from September, however, it's possible that their doting, hands-on grandmother will be making plenty of visits, while maintaining her West Coast base, where she has many friends. (

Doria reportedly has a 'granny flat' in their Montecito mansion and according to TMZ insiders, will stay near the couple's US base. And the dedicated mother has been described as a 'rock' for Meghan and Harry during the difficult months when they departed as working royals and moved to California. (Ya gotta freeload somewhere).

Harry has also formed a close relationship with Doria in the years since leaving the royal family - with a royal source revealing that the Duke of Sussex has grown incredibly close to Doria, who has been a 'tower of strength' for the couple. (Of course, they share a love of a certain green substance).

A source told The Sun previously: 'Harry obviously doesn't have a mum whom he can turn to for advice, but he has always been incredibly close to Doria and never more so than now.'  (She's also one of the very few people that Harry can smoke weed with).

Archive: https://archive.ph/qNTR9

Is the sole purpose of this photo to show she's still wearing her engagement ring? Nothing like enjoying the last days of summer in a garden that's not your own. Obviously this was taken in California as well. Gotta garden in an ill fitting dress that's white and a ridiculously oversized to boot.

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As usual, take with a grain of salt.

Let me tell you a little story. First, the alliterate one is not hooking up with thee billionaire. Now, make his last name Getty and be the young one Angelina Jolie was hooking up with and the marriage vows get thrown out the window and the cuck can spend his life on the BetterUp app crying about it..

No, this is much much more sinister. See, back in the day, the billionaire's family died under very strange circumstances. We all know that. It was tragic. But, that then allowed for the billionaire to be brought into the fold of the dead pedo. Yes, you see on the very FIRST page of the dead pedo's black book is the name of our billionaire's second wife. The one who has been so close to the alliterate one and the cuck that they have double dated and that they still talk to all the time. The second wife reported everything back to dead pedo and made sure her husband invested with the dead pedo too.  So, darling, when all of you are doing podcasts and such today and making videos, make sure to mention how close the alliterate one and the woman on page ONE of the black book are. Bring it right to them. 

*****************
Response that I think fits:

Billionaire is Ian Wace, a British hedge fund guy. Wife #1 and 2 little children died in a (hmmm...weird....) car crash, 1994, right behind Wace, but Wace was in a different car.

Wace's second wife was Fiona Hardy. They divorced after a few years.

In 2012, Wace married Saffron Aldridge. The only timeline that makes sense if H&M "double-dated" with Wace and Saffron Aldridge is if it is Saffron Aldridge (third wife of Wace) who is on page 1 of Epstein's black book.

Rumor is that Wace and S. Aldridge are no longer together....

Wace’s private Scottish island is Tanera Mòr...apparently H&M visited there this last month.

It's a long article, but here are the Highlights:

Their prospective new neighbours in the Cotswolds are gossiping furiously over WhatsApp and in the aisles of the local delicatessen about which house the Sussexes are buying, where Archie and Lili will attend school and when they might first bump into either Prince Harry or Meghan.

I’m told they are now staying ‘indefinitely’ in a spare house on the land of an extremely wealthy friend on the fringes of the Cotswolds.

Despite reports suggesting that the couple have agreed to buy an exquisite £12million house, I am assured by three separate sources that there is no deal on that place – at least not yet.

There are a number of options, though, ‘because there is so much on the market at the moment’.

The Sussexes are house-hunting in earnest now that they have ‘boots on the ground’, with a gargantuan budget which strikes some of their Californian crowd as downright improbable, fearing they may have to give up their US base after all.

So what comes next for them work wise? Crucially, says the friend, there will be no commercial activities in the UK for either of them during the years ahead.

The idea is that this will allow them to abide in some way by the deal agreed with the late Queen at the Sandringham summit – an agreement that they would be free to make as much money as they could, just as long as they no longer presented themselves as working members of the Royal Family.

Some will see this as a threadbare fiction, perhaps even an insult. The fact is that Harry is still royal and he will carry on working. Some of those engagements will look exactly like royal engagements.

His father the King appears to be adopting an ostrich approach where he ignores the way it looks, and it is briefed that Harry’s life is nothing to do with him and he knows nothing of his plans. Not everyone is convinced that this can be true.

There will be a culture shock, again, for Meghan. A friend says: ‘At this time, Meghan is kind of shocked that they have school on a Saturday, other than that she is looking forward to it.

‘They will have to sell in Montecito,’ says one US-based source upon being shown the details of the house which the couple are said to be keen on. Adding, after closer inspection of its vast lands and being told the price tag: ‘What! That’s not possible!’

As for their new home in the Cotswolds, I am told that Meghan wants nine bedrooms and a film studio and Prince Harry wants a lot – and I mean a lot – of land, and no footpaths going across it to protect their privacy.

Friends say that they are both ‘all in’ on the British dream. This is something which will strike those who remember their passion for a new life in California as deeply ironic.

Indeed, both are set on what I’m told is ‘Finding Freedom 2' – a reference to the biography Finding Freedom that offered an insight into the couple’s decision to leave the Royal Family for a fresh start in America – and the dream of a new life in a new country on new terms.

This new vision is, say friends, an agreed common goal.

One says: ‘They have an English countryside dream. This will be the first time that Harry has lived in the UK as a private citizen where no one can demand any access to him.

‘It will be very different to when he was a working royal and living in Frogmore Cottage. Then the roof over his head was ultimately down to the country.

‘Now he is going to have a chance to enjoy all of the things he loves about the country, but as a private citizen. They will have more freedom now – it is like finding freedom again.’

I am told: ‘There is an agent involved but they have not seen anywhere yet, so they have not bought yet. Online viewings are all very well but the houses that they are looking at are so huge that you need to go in person and it’s also a really big commitment. I know that they have a number of requirements.

They have apparently been discussing the move since at least the early part of this year, and drew up a shortlist of schools with a lot of care in the early spring before viewing schools in July when they were visiting the UK.

So what do they want for the children?

A friend explains: ‘It’s not academia. That is very low on the list. A nurturing atmosphere is very high on the list. Probably the highest priority is the outdoorsy and sporting ethos. They want to put them in a secure countryside microcosm, so that they will have as normal a childhood as they possibly can.

So what comes next for them work wise? Crucially, says the friend, there will be no commercial activities in the UK for either of them during the years ahead. (SURE JAN - comment mine).

The idea is that this will allow them to abide in some way by the deal agreed with the late Queen at the Sandringham summit – an agreement that they would be free to make as much money as they could, just as long as they no longer presented themselves as working members of the Royal Family.

His father the King appears to be adopting an ostrich approach where he ignores the way it looks, and it is briefed that Harry’s life is nothing to do with him and he knows nothing of his plans. Not everyone is convinced that this can be true.

As for Meghan, who will attempt to carry on running her As Ever lifestyle brand, if she films something in the UK friends say that any footage ‘will be only for her US website’. As Ever does not ship to the UK and there are no immediate plans to do so. The fact is that they are still trying to make the brand work in the US, a far bigger market.

One source this week said that they believe Meghan won’t be able to resist building a film studio at their new home – when they buy it – and will end up creating ‘home making content’ in the UK ‘because that is the heart of who she is’.

Indeed, the idea of this ‘geocaching’ of the Sussex brand may provoke hollow laughter among their many critics who deplore the way that they trashed Harry’s country and his family in Spare, on Oprah and on Netflix in their ‘worldwide privacy tour’, as famously mocked by the US satirical show South Park, and then tried to claim to be private.

Friends insist they don’t want a return to the Royal Family, currently one of the biggest misconceptions about the apparently whirlwind move back to the UK which has had the world agog.

He will, from time to time, also have to get back to the States but believes that the trip is ‘very doable for a day or two’. Sources believe that the companies that want him to work for them will pay for his transatlantic travel by private jet.

Meghan will ‘come and go’ working on her jam, wine and sprinkles business, As Ever, and trying to get a green light from Netflix for one of Archewell Productions’ many development projects.

Some are sceptical about the prospects for either business and one source predicts: ‘It’s all gonna close. They will just piecemeal it out.’

Archive: https://archive.ph/R7SPk

Oh, the snark is lovely:

At this very moment, somewhere deep in the Cotswolds, the Duchess of Sussex is eyeing up a fruit bush and fondling trees on her new estate.

She is wondering if she can bottle their bounty to make a buck and thinking fondly of the plaudits she’d get for rescuing those damsons in distress.

Stop going on about the jam, Jan, I hear you cry! By Jove, your jammy judginess doth jar. Yet I cannot stop. Meghan’s jam has cast a spell on me; it is the hocus poultice on my scone of scorn, the fruit paste that lays waste to any semblance of detachment I might have left. It is everything and it is nothing. It is both spread thin and piled high, if we are to believe the rumours of unsold stock clogging up warehouses across America.

Jam! Of all the things for the duchess to do when she left the UK for a fresh start in the USA, selling jam was perhaps last on her personally-curated list of career possibilities; way behind winning an Oscar, running for president and being the first woman to win the Nobel Peace Prize while simultaneously eradicating world poverty and showing everyone how to fold a napkin.

If the Sussexes had relocated to the state of Georgia instead of California, Meghan would be selling peanuts instead of making peanuts. Perhaps the latter is the real reason why we are where we are, which is somewhere much nearer Cirencester than Sacramento.

This is a classic:

Apparently, Prince Harry is now going to be a stay-at-home dad and that is marvellous news, although there is another word to describe his situation –unemployed.

On Meghan's return to acting:

Of course, there is always room for a walk-on part on Casualty, especially one who brings along her own jam to daub on injuries and wounds in place of fake blood. I knew her strawberry spread would come in useful one day.

This week the couple have sailed into the headlines yet again by condemning Meta for using its data-extraction business model on children and accused the tech giant of settling a £13billion lawsuit to avoid accountability.

You have to laugh. It’s like Mickey and Minnie Mouse firing a peashooter at King Kong.

The case has got nothing to do with the Sussexes, but they remain imbued with a mutual god complex and are secure in their own sense of importance. Their mission is nothing less than delivering us all from evil and making the world a better place, chiefly for themselves.

Archive: https://archive.ph/eQI1i#selection-1691.0-1699.271