u/yeyintko

My ex is my first relationship.
She and I work at the same place, same team even share the same Staff Transport. Almost like 10 hours a day I am seeing her on workdays.
She cheated on me last month. We broke up and just the next day evening I could not control myself seeing her all day and talked to her. We get back together. during those 1 month, she tried to break up with me more than once, saying she feel sorry for what she have done and could not love me that way. Whenever that happens, I didn't let her go. I could not. Then just the day before yesterday, she actually told me to break up again. I actually let her. Yesterday night I texted her if we could give it a shot, she said no and ask me "why I keep trying even though after what she done? and even after what I tried she still cheat". Even though she is the one who cheated, I feel like I am more toxic one and my self-respect is at the lowest point. I know I cannot go to work knowing I will see her 10 hours a day everyday. (seeing also all the time since she sat just in my sight). Please give me any advice/advices if you had encounter this kind of situation before. It is so hard not to text her on weekends. even harder on work days.