Help a FTM rationalize childcare options
Hello! Being October 1st that means I return to work this month, I’ve always said I would never be a SAHM and I still don’t want to be, I just want more time with my little baby. I work in healthcare so 12 weeks is it and that’s better than some.
Nonetheless I have found myself in decision paralysis and my husband is helpful but ultimately supportive of what I want.
First option: in home daycare - that is unlicensed. Recommended to me by two coworkers I trust with my life and whom have sent 3 children to this provider. Pros: so much cheaper that I’d be able to work a 32 hour schedule and have an additional day home with baby and she’d only be in daycare for 3 days a week. She has a pay per day model. The provider only has 4 children max and the age is capped at 2. Due to small size potentially less illness?? Cons: when we toured the house had an odd off putting odor, general in home daycare cons like what if she needs a day off, no cameras, general not knowing. I would have to do all pick up and drop offs due to it being on the way to my work and very out of way for husband.
Other notes: she is a single mom, and on Facebook recently posted about now offering night nanny services.
We will lose roughly $800 if we do not go this route, which is not a deciding factor at all just a comment.
Second option: a facility daycare. Pros: facility is 2 minutes from my house. Super clean, good staff retention, not that we need it now but they provide care through age 12 and offer summer camp for school aged children, both husband and I really liked it, I’d be able to work 7-3:30 which would at least give me more time in the evenings. And we could share pick up/drop off duties. Cameras, app, photos of my kid during the day. The kids seemed happy when we toured and I dropped off paperwork. Cons: more expensive so I’d have to stay full time, general daycare cons: sickness, guilt about her being there 5 days a week.
I know deep down what to choose but I feel so guilty sending my tiny babe anywhere and selfishly want to do anything that means spending more time with her. Please be kind and gently give me hope and suggestions on navigating this new journey for us.
Update: you all are amazing and did exactly what I needed to hear. We toured the in home in early August and were weary enough that we found the facility we are going to choose last week and were blessed with a last minute available spot. The hormones and guilt are just so heavy to bear solo sometimes. Thank you all.