u/yoserena_

I’m trying to remember the title of a novel I read around 2011–2013, although I think it was probably published in the late 1990s or 2000s.
Here’s everything I remember:

The main characters are Black, and I’m pretty sure the author was a Black woman.

The female main character is married but does not have children with her husband.

Her husband has a childhood friend who has just returned home after finishing military service.

When she meets him at a dinner or get-together, she realizes he’s actually her abusive ex-boyfriend.

The ex is now dating or engaged to a light-skinned woman.

Despite knowing he’s toxic, the main character and her ex begin having an affair because the sexual chemistry between them is incredibly strong.

One of the central conflicts is that her husband is a genuinely good man, but she feels like he can’t satisfy her sexually the way her ex can.

The husband eventually finds out about the affair.
I also vaguely remember the husband and the ex’s fiancée or girlfriend considering getting together out of revenge, but I don’t think they actually go through with it.

Does this sound familiar to anyone? I’ve been trying to figure it out.

I wanted to share this spell because it ended up helping me more than I expected.

I had been dealing with ruminating thoughts about someone. I journaled about it, which helped somewhat, but it wasn’t enough. I kept replaying things in my head and was honestly getting annoyed with myself.

I took a black chime candle and wrote my name on one side and their name on the other. I anointed it with olive oil that I keep on hand for spiritual work and had previously prayed over. Then I mixed hyssop and sea salt together and prayed over that as well, setting intentions for protection, purification, removing stagnant energy, clearing my mind, and helping me release what no longer served me. I sprinkled the mixture onto the candle and lit it.

While the candle burned, I gazed into the flame and thought about the person. I spoke aloud everything that had been weighing on me, why I was doing the spell, and what I wanted the outcome to be. My intention was simply to let go, move on, and reclaim my energy. I prayed over the candle for about 10 to 15 minutes and stated that once the candle had burned down, my attachment, thoughts, and energy toward this person would be released and all energy I had given away would be returned to me. Then I went about my housework and let the candle burn out on its own.

The interesting part was that while I was staring into the flame, I could visualize their face less and less clearly. I could actually feel myself releasing the desire to think about them.

It’s been a few days now, and I’ve noticed a huge difference. They’re no longer constantly on my mind. The occasional thought still pops up, but now it passes almost immediately instead of spiraling into minutes of rumination.

I thought I’d share in case anyone else is struggling to let someone go.

I’ve been experimenting with different types of spellwork lately, and I have a question about petition folding that I can’t quite wrap my head around.

A lot of practitioners say to fold a petition toward yourself when you want to attract something and away from yourself when you want to send something away. That makes sense to me in the context of attraction and banishing work.

What confuses me is how that applies to glamour magic.

For example, let’s say you’re doing a glamour so that you’re perceived as trustworthy and favorable during a job interview, or alternatively, a glamour so that you appear unattractive or uninteresting to unwanted attention from men.

In those cases, aren’t you trying to project an image outward rather than attract something inward? If the goal is influencing how other people perceive you, wouldn’t folding the petition away from yourself make more sense because you’re sending that energy out into the world?

Hey everyone, I started to put myself in a honey jar a few months ago and have been experimenting with different ingredient combinations to see what works best for me.

So far, lavender, catnip, and cinnamon have been the strongest combo I’ve tried. The jars seem to work really well at first, but I’ve noticed the effects tend to fade after about two weeks or so.

Usually I “charge” the jar by shaking it, lighting a candle on it, or even doing my makeup with it sitting on my vanity.

I was wondering if anyone else has experienced this? Maybe certain ingredients burn out faster than others?