r/BigAgeGap

I’m sorta just ranting here and just want to see others thoughts. I’m 25 and my partner is 44 I met him when I was 21. Since we first started talking he has been such a sweetheart to me I have no complaints about his personality or anything like that. The thing is I was using him in the beginning (pretty sure you saw that coming) just to see what I can get out of him which is fucked I know. I feel it was kinda common sense why would a young girl talk to an older man if it wasn’t for money ? That’s sorta how I thought of it cause why would an older man want to talk or be with a young girl for. The other thing tho is he never asked for anything sexual which made it even easier for me it was more about having someone to talk to than anything for him it seemed to me . Well I was seeing him maybe like once every month or two months for like 2 years. Then it went to seeing each other once almost every two weeks for about another year. Now he moved over here where I live which is a pretty big city…. Just for me 🫠 he’s been here about a month now. He left everything he knows just to be closer to me. He has a very good job and just transferred over here. Besides that I sorta fell for him the more time spent together the past 4 years. I didn’t even care about the material stuff. I genuinely enjoyed spending time with him. But in the back of my mind that thought still lingered about our age gap, the way we met, I was using him in the beginning, I was still seeing other people behind his back cause he was a secret. Everything has been amazing since he moved over here I have spent every weekend with him but all I think about sometimes is wow I really did take this too far and fell for an old man. How is someone my age supposed to even compete with him. I can’t even date anymore cause nobody has come close to how he has treated me. I never felt this way for anyone and I never thought it would be someone double my age, he’s like a big teddy bear. But like I said that age gap gets to meeee the secrecy with my family gets me. We go out in public and stuff but I’m always worried what if I see family or they see me. How would I explain this. I feel out of place cause everyone I know is in normal relationships lol. I need advice or opinions. I genuinely care a lot for this man but based on those circumstances I mentioned idk what to do this is way way too deep now

Hi all, I am M54, currently a high school history teacher. I have sort of been unofficially dating one of my students (she is 18) for a little bit now and we just really do vibe so well. I really want to lock her down and make it official, but am wondering if I should just wait a few more weeks until she graduates and is done. At the same time, waiting seems so difficult.

Hi, Im hoping to get chatting to a like minded girl to explore our agegap fantasies together. Happy enough for something online but ideally you would be in a similar timezone.

If you live nearby though then you go right to the top of my list as I would love to potentially move offline eventually.

In the interest of complete transparency I will happily admit that i am married but I see that as a positive for the right person, it guarantees discretion, no strings or expectation of commitment, just two people getting to know each other, having a laugh and hopefully a bit of fun together.

So if you are entirely comfortable with my situation and would like to know more about me then please fire me a message.

Its really hard. And also cos of my age I think so many I have crushes on don't see me that way

Where are the best places irl to meet older men and do men prefer to make the move or like a girl telling him she likes him

I recently turned 18 and have been in a few relationships with guys that were either my age or very close to it. nothing serious ever came from those and I felt like they were a waste of time.

I have been thinking more and more about a relationship with a guy who is older. in general I am definitely like much older guys (i find middle aged guys who are like 50s-60s the most attractive) but where I'm from thats not very common but I think could be a good experience.

I am a bit hesitant just because id be new to an age gap relationship and have so many questions about older guys in general that id love to ask.

thoughts?

Recently moved to another state, so no new friends or group at the moment. Old friends are busy with their own lives, and so am I. All my downtime recently is spent chilling alone , so I'm looking for some, or at least one older guy friend, to talk with and entertain my nonsense.

I’m 16F!! And can’t seem to find any older men to chat with I’m consenting age for Canada

I met my man about 3 or so years ago when I started at new job in another state. I knew of him but it wasnt until the 2nd year he got my number and I drunkenly invited him over to my house.

I have been happy but there has been tough times to handle. His family know of my age and love me as their own but no one apart from them knows about our relationship.

For awhile theres been medical problems on his side and ive been trying my best to support him and his parents despite all the pressure and stress that it has put me under.

He says im the one thing that makes him happy and not depressed. He relies on me a lot emotionally. But I feel like I miss being single and im young/dumb and i want to have fun. Im not sure anymore if I want to be stuck in such a big gap relationship hiding secrets. I miss having my own time and space; I feel bad for being distant but I want to focus on myself.

I also feel like we're at different life stages. Im starting to build my life on my own and hes already doing his life and owns a couple houses. I say I dont want kids but what if in the future I want some?. Im not sure what I want

I know he would take it really badly if we broke up and I would have to see him around work. I want to be there for him still but not in a relationship I guess. He said his previously relationship ended badly when things got tough for him.

I dont know what to do.

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Let's chat and see how things go. I'm not looking to rush anything. Tell me about you. I'm open to 40 and older. I think grandpas are sexy too.

Hey :) I'll try not to over explain since I believe the title says everything itself. I'm a 24 year old girl who's into older men and I'd like to talk to someone - I'm not trying to play around or be silly, boys my age are boring and dumb and the fact that they never seem to know what they want (or at least that's what they say) it's annoying, I've always been attracted to older men but as much as I'm attracted to them I also want to experience something genuine and honest, so yeah, I'd love to chat with someone! <3

Im a 20 year old girl, I’m a student and I’ve never ever had a relationship or even held hands with a man. Basically did absolutely nothing romantic or sexual before with anyone.It’s a personal choice because I get hit on a lot but never ever see my type in real life, plus I’m very busy with law school so I see it as a distraction. I don’t despise men I’m just not attracted to most men I see everyday. The few men I find attractive are mostly older men 35-50 but I never tried anything with them because theyre just too old and I kinda find it weird. Just thinking about dating someone a year younger than me repulses me so I don’t know how older men date younger women confidently.

Anyways, 3 weeks ago on my way to uni a 40+ yo good looking man approached me and asked me for my number, said I was extremely pretty and was very honest from the start : said that he wanted nothing serious. (By the way he’s a widower , lost his wife a year ago and has 3 children under 13). I was not phased by this because I’m not looking for a relationship either . I told him I was 20, he said he didn’t mind. I gave him my number and we went on a date later that day at a cafe. It went alright, I’m not very chatty when I first meet someone though. He very explicitly told me what he wanted to do with me so I warned him that I was a virgin. He asked me if I was sure that I wanted to lose my virginity to him, if I didn’t prefer doing it with someone I loved. I said no because I really don’t care and don’t see sex as something sacred. Not gonna lie I’ve wanted to lose it for a hot minute but I wasn’t interest in anyone to genuinely do it.

After the date he wanted me to go to his apartment and I said no, that I didn’t want to do it on the first date. He didn’t take it personally and we ended up going on a little walk around the streets , near my college campus. He kept leading us to deserted little alleys to kiss me and touch me. To be honest I enjoyed it but it felt fucking wrong. The worst is when we encountered people and he let go of my hand as if he knew people would judge him for walking hands in hands with a young woman.

Anyways, later that night he texted me a lot of sensual things and I accepted to see him the day after at his apartment.(i was horny as hell sorry) I only told my sister about him and I didn’t reveal his age but informed her that he was too old for me (she gave me a lecture , I don’t blame her) I showed her his Facebook page, shared his name and shared my location with her the day after because I was supposed to see him again.

He picked me up from uni and we went to his place. At first he wanted me to go in first, so he would join me minutes later. I told him there was no need to do that , his neighbours didn’t know me we didn’t need to hide. (I figured he didn’t want anyone seeing a 20 year old with him). Anyways, we ended up going in together. We mostly did foreplay because he couldn’t get hard because of the condom. He didn’t force me to do anything, made sure that I consented to everything he did to me and that I was comfortable. I really emphasise on that. He didn’t harass me or anything.

After that, we kept texting sensual things and sharing songs that we like. He wanted to see me again but I needed to take a week break to study because my finals are coming soon and everything we did really threw me off. (Because for reminder I was a virgin who never did anything with a guy and within 2 days I had my first kiss and gave/received oral sex with a guy 23 years old older than me. It’s A LOT for me and everything happened so fucking fast)

He didn’t get angry or anything but he started texting me a bit less to give me space i assume. A week later i texted him again . We ended up seeing each other again and that time we really did the devils tango. We talked at lot more on the pillow about life and stuff. I asked about his wife, where he traveled and so on. We really are in different places in life , but we get along. I think we get along because we don’t discuss a lot and I definitely feel that he tries to relate to some of the things I say but he doesn’t really understand them because we’re not from the same generation. I don’t actually care that we’re not that compatible because once again I’m not looking for husband material.
But this situation is completely startling me and I’m very disoriented. Everything happened so , too, quickly.

I have to mention some other things that threw me off . He sometimes has some Freudian slips. He once said “I’m excited to re-watch you” and corrected himself and said “see you again”. I’m absolutely frightened by the idea that he might record us when we do it. If he does I’ll report him without batting an eye I really don’t give a fuck. He also started talking to me about some threesomes and anal and I said uhhhhhhhhh sir,maybe not now????
Once again he’s not forcing me to do anything he’s really testing the waters. And weirdly even though it’s all just sexual I don’t feel taken advantage of, or used, because I’m here for sex too and we’ve been pretty clear about that since the beginning. He’s probably taking advantage of this situation to explore his fantasies but I don’t really care because I am too.

I’m definitely getting attached to him because he’s really sweet .However Im not attached romantically because there’s something in me that stops me from falling for him. Maybe it’s because I’ve never been in love, maybe because it’s way too soon or maybe because HES 43 . I don’t know.I’m just extremely confused.

What do you guys think ?

I’m 23 and really drawn to older men, not just physically, but emotionally too. There’s something comforting about a man who’s experienced, grounded, patient, and knows who he is. I’m not looking to rush anything, I’d rather talk naturally and see where the connection leads.

I’m petite, soft-hearted, and honestly I’ve always had this quiet fantasy of finding an older man I can genuinely feel safe, understood, and wanted with. Someone mature enough to communicate, lead with confidence, and build something real instead of playing games. If you’re 40+ and open to getting to know someone genuine, tell me about yourself. I’d love to chat and see how things go.

Open to all ages and love older guys so please let me knows

😘

My older ex used to share me with 3 of his close friends. It felt weird at first and I was nervous, but I started to like it. My ex was in his 50's. His friends were around his age. Now I'm 20. I was thinking about other older men and if they've shared their gfs too.