If you could design the perfect dating app for Christians, what features would you include? Does SALT have any features that you love? How can we improve? Hopefully we'll be able to implement some of these to serve the Christian community.
I’ve never written a Reddit post before, but I wanted to share my experience with Miah Huber and her Christian matchmaking program, Happy Medium, because I wish I had been able to find more firsthand experiences before I paid for it.
For anyone unfamiliar, Miah has an Instagram account where she posts videos “connecting” single Christians with other single Christians. She has talked about helping create hundreds of marriages/relationships through what she does. I can’t personally verify those claims, but seeing her content made the program seem legitimate and exciting.
A huge part of what appealed to me was the Christian aspect of it. She talked a lot about being prayerful and intentional, seeking God’s guidance, and wanting the process to honor the Lord. As someone who grew up in the church and actively follows the Lord, that really resonated with me.
To be considered for Happy Medium, I paid $200 for an interview. I understood from the beginning that paying did NOT guarantee I would be accepted into the matchmaking database. My issue is not that I might have been rejected. My issue is how the process was handled after I paid.
After I paid through Venmo, I was supposed to receive the link to schedule my interview. I never received it and had to reach out myself. She then sent it to me, and I interviewed with her in mid-April.
I actually felt really good about the interview. She asked about my past, my faith and beliefs, what I was looking for in a future spouse, etc. I also provided a reference. She contacted that reference, and later I provided another friend as a reference as well.
Then I waited.
By July 17, roughly three months after my interview, I still hadn’t received a decision. I emailed and messaged her on Instagram to check on the status of my application. I understood that she had a lot of applicants, so I was genuinely trying to be patient. I didn’t receive a response.
On July 24, I followed up again. She responded and told me she still had not made a decision on my application.
On August 5, I followed up again because she had previously indicated she was hoping to finish the first round of applications around that time. She told me she still hadn’t processed my application, that she had HUNDREDS of applicants, and that she would process mine that week.
I waited again.
On August 25, I reached out because almost three more weeks had passed. I reminded her that on August 5 she had said she would process it that week. I was still trying to be understanding and even said I hoped I hadn’t somehow missed an email or communication because I was still interested and eager to hear back.
She told me she was “prayerfully” going through the applications and trying to be intentional, so the timeline wasn’t guaranteed. She told me she would reach out to me via email the next day.
I thanked her.
The next day came and went, and I never heard from her.
By September 1, I was feeling really discouraged. At this point, it had been around 20 weeks since my interview. During this time, I was still following her Instagram stories and seeing her continuing to take applications and conduct interviews with new applicants while I still couldn’t get a decision on mine.
I finally told her how discouraged I was feeling with the process.
She told me that she didn’t feel “peace” about adding me and was trying to decide whether she wanted to keep the database smaller or make it bigger. She also told me she didn’t currently have anyone to match me with.
She then told me she was going to “sit intentionally” with my application that night and would get back to me first thing the next morning.
Again, I waited.
I didn’t receive a text the next morning or afternoon. That evening, instead, I received an email from her assistant saying they needed another reference from someone I had known for longer than four years.
So I provided another reference.
At this point, I started feeling very uncomfortable with the process. After months of being told that my application was being prayerfully and intentionally considered, being told multiple times that I would hear back by a certain time and then not hearing anything, and then suddenly being asked for another reference, I started questioning what was actually happening behind the scenes.
What bothered me most was the repeated use of spiritual language throughout the process. I obviously cannot know what someone else is actually praying about or what their intentions are. But from my perspective, phrases about “prayerfully” processing my application, not feeling “peace,” and “sitting intentionally” with it started to feel increasingly uncomfortable when they were paired with repeated missed follow-ups and months without a decision.
On September 7, I finally decided I was done. I told her I wanted to withdraw my application and asked for my $200 back.
She told me she would not refund me because of her refund policy.
The problem was that I had never been sent this policy, never signed it, and did not remember being asked to acknowledge or agree to it when I paid. I told her that. Her response was essentially that everyone had access to the policy.
I can only speak for myself: I did not know this policy existed when I paid the $200.
I told her that because of everything that had happened, I planned to dispute the payment through Venmo. She maintained that she was standing by her refund policy.
I want to be really clear about something because I don’t want this post to be misunderstood:
I am not upset because I wasn’t accepted into a matchmaking program.
I knew when I paid that acceptance wasn’t guaranteed. If I had interviewed in April and received an email shortly afterward saying, “Thank you for interviewing, but we don’t think you’re a fit for the database,” I would have been disappointed, but I would have understood.
What I have a problem with is paying $200, interviewing in April, providing multiple references, repeatedly being told my application would be processed or that I would hear back, having to initiate almost every follow-up myself, waiting approximately 20 weeks without a clear decision, and then being denied a refund based on a policy I don’t remember ever receiving or agreeing to.
The faith aspect is also why this experience bothered me so much. When a business or service is marketed specifically to Christians and repeatedly uses language about prayer, God’s leading, peace, and intentionality, I think there is an added responsibility to communicate clearly and follow through on what you tell people.
I’m sharing this because I searched for other people’s experiences when I was going through this and couldn’t find much. I can’t speak to anyone else’s experience with Miah or Happy Medium, and I’m not claiming to know her motives. I’m simply sharing what happened to me and the timeline I personally experienced.
If anyone else has gone through the Happy Medium application/matchmaking process, I’d genuinely be interested to hear what your experience was — positive or negative.
Anyone else agree with Delphine that Christian dating culture needs to change so that you can explore a connection:
- without the pressure of it having to lead to marriage
- without gossip from other Christians
os solteiros que nunca casaram deveriam namorar apenas pessoas que também nunca se casaram?
divorciados deveriam namorar apenas outros divorciados?
entendo que talvez seja mais simples namorar alguém que também já passou pelas dificuldades do divórcio, caso você seja divorciado. mas, se você nunca se casou, namoraria alguém que é divorciado? se não, por que não?