r/UnbreakableMind

I used to be someone who liked things only when they were in a very precise way. I was the kind of person who never felt that things were good enough, redoing emails two or three times and practicing conversations over and over, just so I could slide in the words whose importance only means something to me. I kept pushing myself towards an ideal, against a flawless version that didn’t actually exist. I accepted this as part of my mental make up, thinking it was the cost of havingbyproduct of having high standards. After listening to a conversation on Bren Brown's 'The Gifts of Imperfection' on Dialogue: Podcast discussions on books, I realized it wasn't any inherent personality trait of mine at all. Rather, it was just the defense mechanism I created to avoid the constant feeling of inadequacy.

Here's what I learned:

1. First, Perfectionism isn't about doing your best (even if you might have the same reference). Perfectionism is about seeking approval. According to Brown, perfectionism is not about excellence but about seeking approval. It's a tag we like to impersonate to avoid being seen, a shield we employ to take shelter. Realizing that my need to polish and redo work was less about quality and more about preserving my sense of self helped me make sense of my exhausting behavioral patterns.

2. Second, Your worth isn't something you have to earn, it's where you start. The central thesis of the book is that you are worthy right now. Not after a promotion, not after losing the last 20 pounds, and not after getting your life in order, you do not have to strive to become "good enough." However, we often hold the opposite belief- that we must somehow earn our worthiness before we're allowed to fully feel it. The author explains that this mindset comes from a scarcity of spirit. And this inner feeling of lack bleeds into every aspect of life and always tells us that we are one slip-up away from proving, to ourselves, that we were never enough.

3. Third, there are two different ways of getting over discomfort. One is going through it and eventually surpassing its finish line or boundary (there's always one); the second is actively ignoring it by distracting ourselves or trying to repress it by being indifferent. We live in a culture of numbing, where we're encouraged to be busy and avoid discomfort through distractions (overworking, overeating, shopping, scrolling, etc.). The problem is, you can’t numb just the bad feelings. Numbing unpleasant emotions inevitably numbs the pleasant ones too, and without any of them, we feel no connection to our experience and no joy. Accepting discomfort instead of escaping it is the only way to feel anything good again.

4. Fourth, securing rest and joy are not rewards, they are necessary components of our social functioning. This thought that rest and play are not earned luxuries but essential requirements to become resilient, went against everything I had believed as an adult- that exhaustion proved my worth and that slowing down was something to feel guilty about. I learned that defining our self-worth based on how productive we are is a barrier, not a virtue.

5. Fifth, boundaries are not walls. The act of "setting boundaries" is a practice in kindness. Boundaries are not to be conceptualized as borders but as the compassionate boundaries of a home, which bifurcates different areas within it. My whole life I believed that if I set a boundary or said "no," I was committing an essential but selfish act, something that could disappoint others. But the author makes the argument that not having boundaries doesn’t make you more loving but only leads to resentment toward those you didn’t say no to.

Understanding the origins of my perfectionismand letting go of the need to earn my worth has greatly calmed me down. It's not because I do less. It's because I don't have to justify rest or setting boundaries. The central message of the book is so simple, yet it’s one of the most difficult lessons to live: Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.

Everyone dreams of success, but very few stay disciplined long enough to achieve it.

The market doesn't reward hope, luck, or emotions—it rewards patience, consistency, and disciplined execution.

Every chart you study, every mistake you learn from, and every trade you manage with discipline is a step closer to your goals.

Stay focused. Stay patient. Trust the process.

What's one habit that has made you a more disciplined trader?

Your core is unshakable.

One of the hardest truths I've learned is that the pain we don't understand doesn't simply disappear. Instead, it finds another way to make itself known.

For years, I carried anger toward my parents and other important people in my life because of the difficult circumstances I had to endure growing up. I believed my anger was the problem and that if I could just get rid of it, everything would be fine. What I eventually realized, however, was that anger was only what appeared on the surface. Beneath it were hurt, disappointment, fear, and grief for things I felt I needed but never received.

That anger shaped me in ways I didn't fully recognize at the time. I became isolated. I kept people at a distance. I avoided vulnerability and often became evasive. Although I never intended to, there were moments when I hurt others because I was carrying wounds I had not yet learned to confront.

Looking back, I can see that many of my reactions had less to do with the people around me and more to do with unresolved pain from the past. In many ways, I was responding to old wounds while believing I was only reacting to the present.

One insight that deeply resonated with me is that anger is often a form of protection. Just as a wounded animal learns to growl to keep itself safe, people who have been hurt can develop anger, defensiveness, control, or distance as a way of protecting themselves from being hurt again. In this sense, anger isn't always the wound; often, it is the armor protecting it.

The danger is that pain we fail to understand rarely affects only ourselves. When we don't recognize what we're carrying, we unconsciously place it on the people around us.

As a result, others end up feeling the impact of battles they never started, while we continue to view today's situations through the lens of yesterday's hurt.

Time, reflection, and difficult conversations allowed me to better understand my own pain. Not to excuse what happened or erase the past, but to recognize that beneath the anger was someone who simply wanted to feel seen, understood, safe, and loved.

Healing, I learned, isn't about pretending the pain never existed or forcing yourself to forgive before you're ready. Rather, it is about having the courage to sit with the hurt, understand it, and stop letting it dictate how you treat yourself and others.

Because when we don't understand what we're going through, we often end up hurting others along with ourselves. Yet when we begin to understand our pain and face it with compassion instead of judgment, we stop carrying it forward.

And perhaps the greatest gift of healing is that the cycle ends with us.

"So plant your own gardens and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers."

Halfway through the year is your reminder that you don’t have to fix everything today. 🌿💜 Healing isn’t a race, and growth doesn’t happen overnight. Give yourself permission to pause, breathe, and take one mindful step at a time.

If the first half of the year didn’t go as planned, that’s okay. Every new day is an opportunity to begin again with compassion instead of pressure.

✨ Affirmation: I release the need to have it all figured out. I trust my journey, one step at a time.

💭 What is one thing you’re giving yourself permission to let go of as you move into the second half of the year? Share it below. ⬇️

#HalfwayThroughTheYear #MidYearReset #MentalHealthMatters #Mindfulness #MindfulnessBasedStressReduction #MBSR #HealingJourney #SelfCompassion #StressRelief #EmotionalWellness #WellnessJourney #MentalWellness #InnerPeace #SelfCare #PersonalGrowth #MindfulLiving #WellnessCommunity #YogaForMentalHealth #MeditationPractice #Wellness #ASprinkleOfWellness 💜

Stop expecting me to smile so much... I've been stuck in a default setting of survival more than I should. So no I will not always smile. My soul is tired I bare the weight of the world and my life on my shoulders everyday. I'm faced with a tone deaf world that caters to the abilities of self serving very little empathy is shown.

My eyes are stained from years of heartache and loss that have tortured every fiber of my soul. My heart is slashed every which way for I bare deep wounds that bleed every so often. Every false intention, every lose word uttered from mouths that do not walk my every waking path exhaust me.

Empty recources, dead ends flood my streets of progression. Cracking every code I can possible imagine to create smooth sailing. The world shuts me out every other day so why should I smile? My mind rages wars between my people, myself, and most of all the system that is supposed to help me. So my face is soaked in blood, scares, glass shards and so much more.

I maybe be a pretty face but this face has fought her entire life just to exist. So no I will not act, I will not beg, I will not gravel. I refuse to quit, I refuse to live a life catering to empty one-sided fights, I refuse to drain energy on close minds that lack the openness ability.

My soul is tired, my eyes are tired, my mind is tired. So why should I freaking smile? To please the masses that lack empathy or at least the acknowledgement for my behalf to bettering society? My body aches of knives that were constantly stabbed in my back. Nails that pierced every point in my on going coffin. So no I will not smile.

Smiling for me is a job within itself so I'm validated if I don't want to smile. I have a dense notebook lined, edged, teared with every diagnosis, crippling existence that makes me, me. My reasons are very valid beyond measure. If I smile, it will be on my own terms and own vulnerability. Until them wars, and my existence is all my being cares to burden for my wondering restless soul is enough to carry on.

Just know if I ever smile it will be on my own damn terms. I highly suggest you bask in every moment a smile is plastered upon my very war beaten face for my eyes bare my soul, but my smile, my smile is a clear indication I feel freedom coming my way. That freedom will be my endless lines of accomplishments yet to shine upon this world for all to see.

#confidence #mindsetiseverything #strengthisneveraweakness

Everyone fails. Every successful person has faced setbacks, disappointment, and moments when quitting seemed easier than continuing. The difference isn't that they never failed—it's that they refused to let failure become the end of their story.

Every mistake teaches a lesson. Every setback builds resilience. Every challenge is an opportunity to come back stronger, wiser, and more determined than before.

Progress isn't about being perfect. It's about showing up, learning, improving, and refusing to give up when things get difficult. Keep moving forward, even if it's only one step at a time. Your greatest success may be waiting on the other side of the struggle.

Your inherent value is not up for debate

Today I wrote this poem. To inspire everyone to remain strong. Always believing in yourself is never wrong.

• It's easy to focus only on the end goal, but real success is built through small daily steps.

• Every mistake teaches something, every setback makes you stronger, and every bit of progress matters.

• Trust your abilities, stay consistent, and keep moving forward.

• The destination is important, but the person you become along the way matters even more.

• Funny how humans keep trying to sprint to the finish while ignoring the part where the actual growth happens in between.

Everyday always attempt to improve. When you 100% believe in yourself always. It is nearly impossible to lose.

This message was inspired from a reply. That I got in a message from U/Ancient-Skill1514. Thank you for the inspiration.

Your inner calm is not a stage for others' drama.

Powerful motivational words to use everyday. To overcome all obstacles standing in your way. Through believing you will always be o.k.

Remind yourself everyday you are one of a kind. Optimism is never really hard to find. When positivity confidence love fills your mind.