r/carer

Hi everyone, I'm not sure if this is the best place for a post like this but I don't know where else to go. I'm 28, based in the UK and I've been supporting my parents since I was a teenager. They're able-bodied and pretty independent, so there's no need for me to assist them in the day-to-day.

However, they struggle with English and rapidly evolving technology. So whenever there's an administrative task that concerns the home (mortgage, gas and electric) or their personal assets (cars, bank account etc) I have to step in and help them resolve it. The situation used to be I'd translate for them over the phone or in person, but nowadays I'm speaking on behalf and resolving the issues myself. They aren't even in the room a lot of the time because of our various work schedules.

I'm basically advocating for them which makes me incredibly anxious. I was too young to be involved with any of the initial paperwork, so whenever an issue arises I have to do a lot of catching up and try and make sense of the situation. Money is usually involved in the equation and I feel an incredible amount of pressure to do right by them, to make sure they're not being taken advantage of.

As I said, this all started when I was a teenager so it's been going on for some time. I've always felt a little stuck in between worlds; I don't do enough to qualify as an "official" carer, but I can't live my life like an average 20-something year old either. It's very isolating and I often feel confused and resentful of my situation.