r/dating_apps

Leteni Tinder accounts dated 2025 down words. Ready business

We all know the general complaints. But I’m curious about the patterns men experience that doesn’t get talked about enough.

As women, it’s very easy for us to categorise men or complain about male behaviour but I’m genuinely curious about your side of it. What is it actually like for you?

What do you wish was different?
• What are you actually looking for that feels impossible to find online?
• What’s missing in modern dating that nobody is addressing?

I’m doing research on modern dating and the male experience is genuinely underrepresented in this conversation. If anyone wants to share privately or fill out a short form (just a few questions, completely anonymous) I’d love to hear from you. DM me and I’ll send it over. (If thats even possible, im new to reddit😅)

Every response helps. 🫶🏿

I am 55 and my job as a store manager does not leave me much time to play games on dating apps. After a long day of managing staff and dealing with customers the last thing I want is to spend my evening browsing through fake profiles. The big platforms feel like everyone is just a product for sale and quality is secondary to volume. I realized I was spending hours every week just blocking accounts that were clearly not real people or had zero interest in a serious connection. I moved my profile to Sequel because I wanted to see if a niche dating platform would give me a better experience with people my own age. It is a massive relief to stop dealing with guys who are clearly just targeting older women to find a sponsor or to pull some kind of scam. On the mainstream apps I was constantly seeing photos that did not look real or were obviously taken from the internet. The constant barrage of fake identities on other sites made me feel like the algorithm was actively working against my goals. On sequel the pace is much more manageable and the people I see actually fit the criteria I set for my future partner. Paying for a subscription feels better when you are talking to verified adults who share your values instead of scammers hiding behind ai pictures. I prefer to put my money into a service that prioritizes security and human connection rather than a slot machine that wants me to keep swiping forever. It is nice to have a conversation where I do not have to wonder if there is a real person on the other side of the screen. This switch has saved me so much frustration and allowed me to approach dating with a much more positive mindset

Im 18m, I have never had a girlfriend but do have friends who are girls its not like i cant talk to them but i just want something casual are dating apps a good idea? Also which app would be best? I think hinge seems better but feel to give me recommendations. Are 18/19 year old girls on these apps because i genuinely have no clue. But yeah Id love to get any advice, what to expect and what not. Also Im not looking for something other than casual unless it goes really well is that a good mindset to have?

I’m testing a startup idea for a dating app focused on one specific problem:

People match, chat for a bit, then nothing turns into a real-world plan.

The concept is that after two people match, they have 7 days to chat and agree on a date plan. The date would be booked through a venue that has signed up to the app, with the potential for special offers or date-friendly bookings.

Once the date is booked, they then have a further 7 days to actually attend the date. If no plan is made, or the date does not happen within the window, the match closes.

The idea is not to force people to meet instantly. It is to stop matches drifting forever and give people a clearer path from match → chat → venue date → post-date check-in.

The prototype includes:

- profile context beyond photos

- pass / potential / like options

- 7 days to agree on a date plan

- venue-based date booking

- potential venue offers

- safety prompts

- verification / reliability concepts

- no-show handling

- post-date check-in

I’ve shown the prototype to around 20 people so far and feedback has been positive, but I’m trying not to mistake polite interest for real validation.

What would you test next?

Would you focus on:

- whether users like the 7-day planning window

- whether venues would want to participate

- whether venue offers matter

- whether reliability / verification feels useful or creepy

Dating as an introvert at 53 is exhausting because the pressure to perform on a first date is too much for my social battery. I spent 8 years single after my divorce and jumping back into the scene was a massive shock to my system. My job as a store manager requires me to be social all day long so when I get home I have very little energy left for small talk with strangers. I realized that popular dating apps were draining me because they focus on quick swipes and instant meetings which felt like a second job.

When I first opened Sequel the whole test thing felt like a hurdle. I almost closed the app because I just wanted to see matches instead of answering questions about my personality and introversion. But I am glad I stuck with it. The experience changed once I realized the matches I was getting were not just random faces but people who actually fit my temperament. It took away that constant anxiety of having to explain over and over that I am not being cold just because I need a quiet evening.

It was not a perfect start and sometimes seeing fewer matches than on the big apps was a bit frustrating. However the quality of the profiles I did see was much higher because people actually took the time to fill them out. I appreciate that the detailed profiles let me see the dealbreakers before I even send a message. I no longer feel the need to defend my boundaries or justify why I prefer a calm conversation over a loud bar. Being able to see if our lifestyles align before I commit to a night out saves me from so much unnecessary stress. This approach has changed how I look at dating because it finally feels like my personality is an asset rather than a hurdle

To anyone reading this, my friend and I are making a new dating app (I know…) which will launch in London first.

It’s a bit of a Black Mirror concept where we use an AI companion to genuinely get to know you and then match you based on a deeper understanding of you. It might seem a bit uncomfortable but maybe check it out first and see how it feels.

After experiencing dating in London we genuinely think the whole landscape is broken so we’re trying to come up with some sort of technological solution.

If you’re interested in testing out the beta that’s going to be launched in a couple weeks please let me know and we’ll get you on as a tester.

We’re called Coacha and we genuinely want to try and fix what’s definitely broken.

Out of interest, can I ask would people be willing to talk to an AI to learn about them in order to get better quality matches? Or is that too Black Mirror?

I’d be interested to know.

View Poll

I wonder about this. How many people are not on the dating sites to engage and meet someone special but rather to either hope their ex sees them, gets jealous and wants them back OR they are on there rebounding from an ex? I say this because I have been on dating apps on and off over the last few years and so many guys I met were clearly still attached to their ex. I found out after dating someone for a short time that he was in communications with his ex the entire time and that his whole reason for going on the app was in hopes that she would find out and want him back. LOL, makes me wonder how much time I have wasted and this would also explain why people ghost - maybe they succeeded in getting their ex back? Thoughts?

My dad is in his late 50s and is finally ready to start dating again after being divorced for a few years. He’s pretty social in person, but the whole world of dating apps is brand new to him. We’ve looked at the mainstream ones like Tinder and Bumble, but they feel way too swipe heav and focused on casual hookups, which isn't really his vibe

My biggest concern is the safety factor. I’m honestly worried about him running into bots or romance scams, as he's not always the most skeptical person online. I recently saw niche apps mentioned as a better alternative because they focus on verified profiles and intentional connections rather than just endless swiping

Has anyone here helped a parent use niche apps for the 50+ crowd? I’m wondering if these platforms are actually safer and more curated, or if it’s just the same "sketchy" experience with a different brand name. Would love to hear if anyone has had a good (or bad) experience with them!

A year ago, I was frustrated with what dating apps were doing to people.

Every app was the same: upload your best photo, swipe, get ghosted, repeat. Connections were built on thumbnails. Depth was an afterthought.
So I started building Cuper.

The idea was simple (and apparently controversial): What if your personality was your profile? No photos. Match by MBTI type, Enneagram, and Attachment Style — the things that actually predict whether two people will work long-term.
We just launched on Google Play, and here’s what building it taught us:

1. The no-photo decision scared everyone at first — including us.
   Every advisor said “you’ll get zero users.” Turns out there’s a huge, underserved crowd of people exhausted by appearance-first dating. They’ve been waiting for this.

2. Psychology frameworks are polarising.
   Half the people we spoke to said “MBTI isn’t scientific.” The other half already knew their type, their partner’s type, and their parents’ types. We built for the second group.

3. Safety is harder than features.
   OTP login, block & report, zero-tolerance CSAE policy — getting this right before launch took longer than building the matching algorithm. Worth every day.

4. India is ready for intentional dating.
   We’re based in Bangalore and the early signal from users who want something real and not just something to swipe through at 2am has been genuinely exciting.
   We’re live on Android now. iOS coming soon.
   Would love brutal feedback from this community what would make you try it (or never touch it)?
   cuper.me

Buying them at good rates