I feel like every time I log on, I see posts, but the posts seem fake. Everyone talking about their tributes and showing off their gifts, but the images look AI generated. Or maybe I just can't tell what's real or fake anymore.
Is anyone else experiencing this? Are these actual sends, or is it all just performance? Because it feels like the platform has become a highlight reel of things that didn't actually happen.
Im a male dom and I have a female paypig but I dont really see many other people in this same situation. Why is this soo rare?
Been waiting for real subs go come instead of those who expect something in return all the time. I miss the good old times.
For me, it’s the psychology of the kink. And psychology doesn’t care about the amount, it cares about the weight, the impact. $100 from someone who manages his monthly budget carefully so he can send, carries the exact same erotic weight for him as the $500 from someone who doesn’t have to pay as close attention to his budget.
When the person on a budget skips something for himself so he can send it to you instead, he’s saying something important about his kink and about you.
So is the person who can pay your $500 car payment. Both are real. Both deserve a dominant who understands what control she wields.
Treating someone like their kink isn’t worth our time because the number is smaller doesn’t support what findom actually is. And it leaves good subs in the hands of dommes who don’t deserve them.
What I offered this particular person was curation. A small ritual, an ongoing experience that didn’t cost me much time at all, but gave him someplace real to serve from. That’s what this is supposed to feel like.
For those of you who’ve been dismissed, your thoughtful management of what you can afford is not a disqualification. It’s good information. It tells us something about who you are.
The dominant who meets you where you are now will be the dominant you choose to grow with.
🖤
Hello all! New here. I’ve always been the s in D/s but I feel I am coming into my feminine powers and have been considering trying FLR or findomme to see if that’s where I am now. I’ve had past doms tell me I’m secretly a D but I always emphatically said no.
So I’m not new to the scene but I’m not sure where to start to find a subbie who would be ok with someone learning the ropes (heh). What would you suggest are the best subreddits or apps to learn steps to be a findomme (like safety, privacy, what to avoid etc). I’m happy to hear any advice/suggestions. Looking forward to getting all my accounts set up and having some fun! TIA
wanted my throne to feel more immersive and personal instead of just random . tried different styles and finally settling on this one. curious to see what other dommes (and even subs) think ? still tweaking it.
Okay so I know discord isn't niche by any means, and there IS a big community of findom on there! But it's never talked about much on reddit.
I'm just making a post to recommend it to those who might want to try a different avenue on top of reddit :)
There are tons of different findom servers you can find on disboard, and it's great if you want a more personalized experience with subs and dommes.
I made 14k last month and 10k the month prior, most of my income was chyrpe, discord, and x in that order.
My tips for discord and reasons I recommend it areeee...
-use the website disboard to find findom servers
-theres a server directory with every findom server listed as well (I don't own it so I hope that doesn't count as promo if it does I'll remove this)
-make your own server!! Promote it using disboard.
-in the server I run for dommes and subs I set it up so they need to answer a few questions before joining
-you can AV everyone directly through the app before they join your server, and 98 percent of findom servers AV all their members so it takes a lot of stress off not having to AV everyone yourself and knowing you're in a community where everyone is of age
-if you enjoy gaming a lot of the servers have set gaming channels to game with dommes/subs
-most servers have roles to choose from which are things like 'open dms' or 'tribute to dm" so you can click someone profile find out their kinks, dm roles, age, other info, before ever messaging/approaching them
-It's great for sub hunting and I usually hate sub hunting lmao
-most servers have super active mods so time wasters are kicked as soon as they're found out most of the time, as well as bots/scammers. So it's actually all real people.
-far less tik tok dommes.
if you have any questions about it let me know! But I recommend adding it to your rotation.
Tonight I'm sitting on my sofa with sushi, a comfortable evening ahead of me, and a question I've been thinking about lately.
I know a man with a foot fetish.
Ordinarily, people would assume that detail explains the entire relationship.
It doesn't.
He has never asked me to act submissive...He doesn't pressure me to perform for his fetish.
In fact, most of our conversations have very little to do with feet at all.
What he enjoys is conversation.
Humor... Wit... The exchange of ideas... And yes, occasionally spoiling me with thoughtful gifts while we talk.
What makes the situation interesting is that neither of us seems interested in forcing the interaction into a traditional role.
I will never be his submissive... He doesn't expect me to be...He knows who I am... I know who he is... And somehow that has been enough.
It made me wonder whether boundaries are only necessary when someone is asking for power.
Or whether healthy boundaries are simply the result of two people understanding what they are and what they are not.
Perhaps the clearest boundary of all is knowing what will never happen, while still appreciating what already exists.
I'm curious how others navigate connections that don't fit neatly into a predefined dynamic.
Hello once again all my unhinged and demented girls!
Last time I checked in with you here, I created a subreddit for the darker (harder) kinks within the findom community as it seemed like you guys wanted a space to do that.
I had an idea to create another subreddit dedicated to mindfucking findom, but... I'm not sure if there's a big enough need/want for that. Would you guys be interested in a separate subreddit for that, or just keep it included amongst all the regular subreddits?
First possible sub of the YEAR (yeah, it's been that slow) I had to turn down because he wouldn't Age Verify
The amount of times I'm having to reject guys because they won't AV is nuts, is there a way to make it sound less intimidating? I tell them they can use literally ANYTHING as long as it confirms they're an adult
AV is my one biggest requirement, I ask for AV instead of tribute LMFAO why is it so hard?!
I recently discussed with a sub about setting up a debt contract. He suggested using Stripe to collect the payments, but I’ve heard so many horror stories about Stripe closing accounts and withholding funds, with little hope of recovering the money. What other options could we use??
What the fuck?
I don’t understand why people are comfortable to treat other people like that especially online
Like I get the whole thing of hiding behind the screen because trust me whenever I play video games and I’m not gonna lie I get a little aggressive
But that has no correlation
Why are people so comfortable to treat other people so poorly?
This was a little funny I’m not gonna lie. I think I’m pretty and I’m not gonna lie again.. I do happen to smoke weed, but I DON’T DO DRUGS??
Do I actually look like a druggie??
I feel like there are two very different approaches on Twitter and Reddit and I'm just not really sure what is "right" to say when someone comes. I have had a myriad of approaches but I'm not quite experienced enough to know what to say / how to start a dynamic / etc.
I notice subs also seem to, regardless of app, HATE AV so I'm just all together struggling.
What do you guys do? And what do you guys find are the difference between Twitter and Reddit dommes?
Examples, maybe? Like if someone approaches you and is like, "can I serve you?" Just a bit perplexed lol.
Got my first sub in a debt contract and I think it is going to go extremely well!!! 😁😁
I don’t have the name, I think it was odd something but, he genuinely scared me. He wanted an exchange of services instead of cash which is fine, it’s not something I had ever done but it was alright. But then eventually be pushed my boundaries, and it got scary quickly. Toxically obsessive in a non kinky way. To all Dommes out there, please please know your worth. Protect yourself. It was silly of me to accept in the first place I know, it seemed like an interesting idea at the time. No matter what, be confident, protect yourselves, and a wise person told me that, not all money is good money, not all services are good services. Be safe queens 🩷
How have you been worshipped on yours? What fun little games have you played, or things did you do with your subs money funding your parties?
the last month has been DRY. like… REALLY dry. spring was so nice to me, i got some pretty nice subs, some more than decent payments and more.
but from the beginning of june and july? DEAD. nothing. i only got a couple of dm’s from content buyers, time wasters or strictly femdom subs (which i don’t do).
i don’t know what’s in the air, but this vibe got me really down.
is there anything that i can do in this situation? should i just keep promoting and posting just as usual? should i change the tactics?
any advice is appreciated, thank you so much.