One of the rare times you'll ever see me touching a chocolate cake. I don't like chocolate, I only reach for it when I want temporary relief from extreme depression.
I don't really have anything to elaborate on here. I feel like I have been venting consistently on the subreddit for the last week. Because I have. What can I say? I am really sad. There ain't no hope or help on the radar. I feel like it is just me floating by myself in a sea. I imagine this is what people who experience shipwreck actually feel like. You know when they realize no one is coming to save them. Figuratively, of course, you wouldn't catch me anywhere near an ocean.in real life
I am a long-term depression sufferer. I'm just here to release what's in my head. I'll tell you what, I have exhausted all forms of traditional depression help. When you have treatment resistant depression like me, well, this is where you end up. You realize there's truly no help out there for you. It's funny how many people would argue with me about that, too.
But here's the one thing I like to point out, everyone's experience with depression will be unique to them. There is no one-size-fits-all method that works for everyone. And sometimes you end up like me where you have to accept the reality that maybe there just isn't a really great way to treat this. There are temporary fixes, but not truly any real relief. You know what I mean?
It kind of sucks to live like this, but at least I have come to that point of radical acceptance. I ain't going to fool myself into thinking there's somebody out there that's going to help me. No, no, no. I've been down all those roads, and I'm tired of spending thousands of dollars on treatment that doesn't help.
I have to work in less than 3 hours, and I have been up all night. Got a 16-hour shift ahead of me. I didn't want to be up all night, but well, here I am. Depression be fucking with my sleep schedule for the summer too. Lovely, I'm going to spend my whole day utterly exhausted. I may as well enjoy this cake. There's something about chocolate cake from Portillo's restaurant, I genuinely don't mind it.