r/l4l

I had to delete my last post, so I'm back.

Hello. I live in germany and connecting with people is maybe my favorite thing. I'm afraid I'm not your typical german.

I find it hard to connect. I can talk to anyone, make friends and do things but truly connecting with someone is different. I want to understand how they function, what they feel and want. I want to understand how they view the world.

There are times I feel like I don't belong in this world because of the way I am. I have always had to adapt but deep down I'm silly, nice and weird. I yap a lot and when I get excited, I also like to be kind and want to help whenever I can. Standing up for people is very important to me, so is giving back. Emotional intelligence is also very important to me. It's something I'm constantly working on because I do not want to harm people with my pain. I'm willing to learn and share.

I long to belong. It's hard for me to describe. I mean the things I say and I'm very loyal. I want to sit in silence and be okay with that. I want silence full of beauty and vulnerability. Vulnerability is so incredibly important to me, so is growth. I find growing to be painful but it is necessary and I need it.

I need to grow. I'm not the type to stay comfortable all my life. I need challenges and whatever it is that is challenging me, I will take it.

There are times in life in which I feel aimless, lost and then there are times I feel peaceful and know that tomorrow is a new day. I want to talk, share my experiences, share my pain and the things I want in life. I simply want to live to the fullest, with all the pain I have in me, all the laughter and the random thoughts. I want to share all of it. If more happens, I won't say no.

Seeing my partner shine and do better makes me happy. I want to be vulnerable and experience everything so deeply and fully. I want it all. Some people want a dyson, some want 100K followers on instagram. For me, it's connecting. It has always been that way and I don't mind it. Maybe because it's so hard to connect. I want to get under someone's skin and I offer the same - with all the love and fear I have in me.

I'm very accepting and do not like to judge. Some get surprised how accepting I am. It takes courage to open up and I want to welcome it. Let me welcome it, give me the benefit of the doubt.

The boring things: I'm weird. I like coffee quite a lot. I do a pour over every morning. I started crochet and painting abstract, cycling, knife painting, philosophy, reading classics in coffee shops. I like doing different things. I'm kinky and like to experiment. I also have a high libido. Sexually, I'm quite flexible when it comes to roles. I have never been with someone who likes to lead, so I would love to experience that too. Go through my hair and unfortunately I will have to give in.

I'm open to experiment sexually if there is a connection and the distance allows it. Connecting sexually is quite beautiful, if there is trust.

I also like to move my body and enjoy nature. I'm open to a lot of things. Trying new things can be quite humbling and I like that. I can be introverted and switch to extroversion real quick - it depends. Watching movies/tv series is also nice.

Psychology is a passion of mine and helped me understand things. It even helped me understand myself, thanks to all the people who I have connected with.

I don't care if we have a lot in common when it comes to hobbies or not. More to talk about, more to get together just to simply share. I just don't like it when people assume things. I ask a lot of questions but if I'm the only one asking questions, that's not so fun. I guess talking to strangers these days feels a little difficult. I miss the honesty, vulnerability and the curiosity to understand a different view rather than assume the worst.

Please be over 29 years old, at least. And, I'm not afraid older women.

me: https://imgur.com/a/F5uix3E

It would be nice to see a picture too.

There are lots of catfishes here, so I would want to do video calls at some point.