r/ruralR4R

I'm new to off-grid living, but I've been feeling increasingly drawn toward building a life closer to the nature somewhere in Asia or another warm, temperate place.

I'm looking for a man who could first feel like a good friend and companion; with whom sharing everyday life, learning, exploring and building something together would feel natural. Someone who either already has land/a homestead and would like to share that life with a partner or is genuinely interested in creating it together.

I'm imagining something small and simple: a natural home, growing food, planting trees, creating a food forest and having the freedom to live at our own pace. A life that feels joyful to wake up to.

I'm drawn to someone who has an inner life, I myself love to meditate and listen to Osho... so i will be happy to align someone also interested in these or simply someone who has a deep connection with nature. No dogma or spiritual performance; but someone grounded and genuinely curious about life.

I don't have an off-grid background myself, so I'm coming with openness and willingness to learn rather than a list of expectations.

Ultimately, I'm hoping to find a friend with whom this kind of dream could feel real slowly, naturally and together.

If you're already living this way or seriously working toward it and looking for someone to share the journey with, I'd be happy to connect 🌷

35F, Ontario — although I’m increasingly convinced I could happily end up just about anywhere in Canada for the right life (and maybe the right person).

This is slightly unconventional, but here goes.
I’m at a point in my life where a lot is changing, and for the first time in a long time I’m genuinely free to ask: what do I actually want my life to look like?
And I keep picturing land.

Not necessarily some enormous working farm. An acreage, old farmhouse, homestead, hobby farm, rambling property — somewhere with some character, room for dogs, a ridiculous garden, water nearby if I’m lucky, and always something that needs doing.

Which has made me wonder: surely there are single men out there who have the land and the life, but would actually really like a woman to build it with?
I spent most of my adult life running my own business. I’m creative, entrepreneurial and pretty resourceful. I love vintage things, interiors, gardening, cooking, animals, old houses, making beautiful spaces out of imperfect ones, finding undervalued things and generally dreaming up projects. I’m not afraid of getting dirty, but I also appreciate good design, good food and a beautiful kitchen.

I’m not looking for someone to rescue me, house me, or acquire an unpaid farmhand 😂. I’m looking for an actual relationship — attraction, friendship, humour, kindness, emotional maturity and eventually a real partnership where two people are genuinely excited about the life they’re creating together.

I don’t have a rigid picture of what that has to look like, and I’m surprisingly open geographically. Rural Canada appeals to me enormously, especially somewhere near a lake, river or ocean.

Maybe the farmer version of my person is lurking on Reddit wondering where the hell you meet someone who actually wants this life.

So, apparently, I’m checking.
If any of this sounds like you, send me a message and tell me about yourself, where you are, and what you’re building.

The first thing anyone should know about me is that I am fiercely, obstinately, and incurably independent. I think that’s important to lead with because it’s not going to change, and if you’re not looking for that, no worries, I'm just not the right person for you.

When I call myself independent, I mean that I am not looking for someone because I need their time and resources to survive, or even thrive. I do that very well on my own, and I will continue to do so.  

I am financially independent, with a great full-time job that supports my farm, my hobbies, and multiple annual vacations. I have a sound plan for retirement.

I am property independent. I have my own house and acreage. I raise my own livestock, grow my own garden, and either do, barter for, or pay for all maintenance and every upgrade that goes into this property. I like to do things for myself as much as I can.

I am socially independent. I have a very fulfilling social life (for an introvert), I am well-traveled, and I am comfortable doing activities alone - traveling, hiking, camping, movies, etc. My tolerance for social settings is pretty low, however, and I am always grateful to return to a quiet house.

To me, independent does not mean isolated. I volunteer extensively in my community and I rely on my neighbors, just as they can rely on me. I go to church regularly, even though I would describe myself more as an agnostic. I find the development of a community to be as important as any homesteading skill.

My eventual goal is to become as self-reliant as possible, meaning that I can weather short or longer-term disruptions to the amenities society relies on – electricity, stocked groceries stores, full gas stations, etc.

So, what am I doing here, if I’ve got everything figured out? Mainly I want to see if there are any like-minded men out there, because while I can do this alone, I don’t think I want to for the rest of my life. Yes, I enjoy having my privacy and my “me” time – and I hope you do too – but having lived this way for several years, I wonder if it’s sustainable, and I wonder what I might be missing out on. A partner, a best friend, maybe? I won’t know if I don’t look.

I like hiking, camping, fishing, reading, writing, video games, all animals (but I am a crazy cat lady), traveling, antique stores, sitting in a chair staring at the trees, very occasional forays into crowded places, long car rides, swimming, boating, etc.  I do NOT like loud noises, extremist beliefs of any kind, constant text notifications, crowds (I know, I said sometimes it’s okay), flying, or waking up before dawn.

I do not have children and I do not want biological children. I think I would be open to fostering or adopting kids someday. I don’t dress up because it makes me uncomfortable. In fact, pretty much everything I own is along the lines of farm-appropriate pants and T-shirts. If you’re looking for a fancy lady, that’s just not who I am. But if you’re looking for someone who can benchpress you, I recently hit a PR of 150 lbs and still going up. I believe in sharing the work inside the house and out. How boring to work separately when we can work together!

If you’ve read this far, dang! Send me a message, tell something about yourself please.

I’ve had a long and successful career in tech that’s left me severely burnt out. The past couple years I’ve been reflecting and rethinking how I want my future to look. I have a strong work ethic, I’m just tired of giving it all away for a shitty paycheck to some shitty company that finds me expendable.

I'm going to ramble about myself, and you bug me if I sound like your jam.

I’m a jack of all trades and master of none. I love to learn and try things.

I currently live off grid in a rural area and I love it. I want more. I love the quiet of nature and drying laundry in the sun. But I also love a hot shower and a movie night. I like being away from modern distraction but I want a cozy solar punk life (someday).

My current goals this year have to do with getting a lot of hands on experience. Learning to fell a tree, build hügelkultur beds, plant trees, wire solar, manage batteries, build basic structures, use tools, etc.

I love to garden and grow food and I would love to get most of my calories by my own hand. I’m trying to grow enough to share this fall. I have two green thumbs- I’m pretty good at plants. I have raised chickens in the past and I would like to raise my own meat and eggs long term. Birds, rabbits, and maybe the occasional group of goats or pigs. I want to learn to hunt and fish and process animals.

I am a nerd for science. I like flower and chicken genetics. I like disease epidemiology. I like learning about the intricate relationships between fungus and bacteria and roots and bugs. I’ll eat ginger for my tummy and take ibuprofen for pain. I love permaculture but I row crop corn. I work toward regenerative agriculture. I believe in taking care of the land and leaving space for nature. I love talking about these subjects and I adore listening to someone glurge about a topic they know and love deeply.

I am an artist. I like to paint and make digital art, I sew and felt and embroider, I like weird monsters and bright colors. I like fantasy sci-fi and horror. I love snuggling up with my cat, a cup of tea and enjoying a video game, show, movie, or a good book… or discussing them with someone.

I am grey and older and chunky, but I am fit and spend hours working physically most days. I don't want to sit at a desk all day ever again. My goal is to shed some weight and stay healthy and strong long term. I like to eat a lot of veggies because when you grow them they taste good and make you feel good. I can make a mean pot of vegan beans, but my bbq pork ribs will make you swoon. I’m sober 99% of the time, drugs are for holidays, but what you enjoy recreationally doesn’t bother me.

I’ve got no kids and I’m not having any… But I do like kids and I would be glad to be part of a young persons life. I am the “cool aunt” in my family. I am patient, practical, supportive, empathetic, and caring for others is my love language.

I am queer. I’m presenting as a woman because this is how I pass, but I lean non-binary and I am non-gender conforming. I’m not at all picky on what you look like or where you come from or who you used to be. I care more about your heart, your ability to be authentic and honest, your work ethic and commitment, and if our interests and skills fit together like long lost puzzle pieces. If our lifestyles and goals trend toward building a future together.

I feel like I’m laying down the infrastructure for a more rewarding life, and I don’t really want to do it alone anymore. So, bug me if you wanna chat and get to know each other. Maybe we can build something cool together.

See my profile for a photo.

I am from the UK originally and am here now, but don’t live here. So location does not matter.

I am seeking a girl for who having children will be the 1st-2nd most important thing in her life. Someone who wants to live a relaxed life, with her time being for her babies, friends, family and hobbies. Someone who will not have to worry about anything.

My weak spot is for someone who is cute and vulnerable, who would like to know a man who will protect her and create a world in which she can remain feminine. Someone who will come to know she is safe with me and can bear all her vulnerabilities without worry.

For me it’s attractive if a woman enjoys feminine activities like – cooking, reading, writing, painting, singing, ballet, playing an instrument, keeping a herb garden, making handicrafts etc. It’s also attractive if she likes to create a cute world around here with lots of photos for memories, bright colours, a good eye for decorating the home and Christmas tree.

I have a lot of experience in growing food and prefer to live rurally, so a good portion of the household food can be clean and high quality.

I live quite simply and am drawn towards relationships that are real and life lived without vice. I don’t smoke, drink, take drugs, drink coffee, eat sugar and junk food, watch anime, play computer games or watch [things online].

Height: 6'1"

Faith: Christian; drawn to Orthodoxy

Financially independent

If this sound like the life you need, I would like to know what is the most important thing to you.

My wife has been huge on the idea of living in the country, the more quiet the better. She has always dreamed of a farm/ranch or even a quiet cabin style life.

I cannot achieve this for her myself so asking around here to maybe make her dream come true. She's a family values and traditional type girl. Very sweet, very loving. Wants kids and make the house a home.

Anyone possible interested in helping this become a reality would be great.