My GF broke up with me because I wasn't "romantic enough" when I was the only one trying..
Its been a month since we "broke up." (Ill explain the quotations later).
This was my first "real" relationship I've had. I keep reading over the texts and they hurt just as much, I was hoping that I would get over this quickly. I'm looking for thoughts and/ or criticisms please be respectful.
A month ago my gf had blocked me on everything, for context we had not had any fights or issues until this point. My first thought was "Is she okay??" She had vented to me about SH and I ofc was worried more than mad. I was trying so hard to be the best girlfriend I could, I made her DIY lipstick card, a note, a playlist, I planned all our dates and paid for most of them. Then one day she blocked me with no goodbye or explanation. I texted her number asking her if she was okay and what happened. She didn't respond. I went to my closest friend lets call her Melon. I had told her all about the situation before I had told anyone else.
I texted her best friend who had heard nothing from her and hadn't talked to her for a few days. The text I sent to her best friend went like this:
*scroll to top to see texts w/ Lemon, 2nd one w/ blue bubbles*
For more context specifically for the second image, the last time I saw Ex at that time was at her birthday. Ex had mentioned being mad at Lemon for not wanting to go out to plans last minute. Lemon has anxiety according to Ex and "(Lemon) can't talk to anyone." I asked several friends how accurate this was and many said she was actually quite out going and even approached them first despite having anxiety.
So Ex was mad at Lemon too and hasn't talked to her either. Eventually... Ex responded.
*scroll to top to see texts w/ Ex, first w/ green bubbles*
She had responded, she was clearly much better than I was. I didn't want to fight with her, I didn't want to argue, I just wanted an explanation. Clearly we are very different people. I've been proven wrong I thought friend breakups were worst but this hurt way more.
She thought I didn't like her. I couldn't fit it in the screenshot but she listed some reasons why she didn't think I liked her. To sum it up. I didn't dress the way she deemed attractive and two I wasn't "physical enough." No she didn't specify what the second one meant. This was odd because first of all she said she doesn't care about looks. To picture the style I have its kind of tomboy with some occasional cottage core/ cozy vibes. Her style is a hot pink, I don't know how else to describe it since that's the only color she wears, she occasional wears all black. Her hair is also dyed pink btw.
Second in the reasons she said why would she want to go near me after me not being comfortable with my friend "bumping into me." Which isn't what I said at all I had talked to her about my friend always acting like me and her were dating like putting her arm round me which was the thing I was talking to her about that some how turned into my friend "bumping into me." Its like a game of telephone with her, she even admitted to not remembering things.
At her birthday I had the courage to hold her hand. I don't like physical touch but I knew it was important to her so I wanted to make her happy. She had never made any effort to initiate things like that. We had only been dating for a little over a month then and as I mentioned in the very beginning this was my first "real" relationship. I even got us matching necklaces and plushies.
After we had texted I just said okay, I had no energy left after just wanting closure which she only gave because Melon had talked to her aka my closest friend.
So reddit am I the one in the wrong for not being "physical enough" or not having the style she wanted me to have?