u/0XICODONE

May out of town trip kami with work friends puro kami girlies and may 1 boy. Matagal na itong plano at nakkwento ko rin kay bf dahil excited rin ako sa gala.

Okay sa bf ko (25F) ng 7 years , ldr kami most of the time bf (26m)nung una, pero nung nalaman niya na kung sino ung 1 guy, pinagbawalan niya na ko sumama dahil may selos issues na siya ron for almost 2 years. Sabe ko, sayang lang selos mo dahil wala siyang bilang sakin, i even forgot na andon siya sa group.

Hanggang sa naging intense yung arguments namin, dahil ginusto ko talagang sumama. Main reason ko is ayaw ko ng feeling ko im very controlled and alam ko namang wala akong ginagawang mali. Gusto ko pa rin na may individuality ako at social life kahit papano. We’re both tired and stressed from work and i always look forward to these trips to destress and feel alive. Pero ang dating nito sa kaniya ay prinoprotect ko si guy, and i was only making bs and excuses to spend time together. Mas lalo lang siyang napikon at nagalit.

Sabe ni bf kami nalang daw mag travel doon instead. Dahil gusto niya raw maglibot kami around habang seeing it for the first time together. He is upset that i get to see the place for the first time with others esp w the guy he is jealous with.
I argued na he always said that but never naman planned bc he’s always busy sa work. Nag iipon daw siya for “our future”. I said ok i respect that. But let me go on this trip, since booked and paid na.
Out of his tantrum, gusto niya nang sumama sa amin. Pero sabi ko settled na ung trip sa agency. At ayoko ng magmukang the dramatic one at makalat sa work group namin. Isa pa, niyaya ko na siya una pa lang sabi niya ayaw niyang makipagplastikan w other ppl. Ngayon gusto niya na?

Nag tantrum siya, at nag sisimula na kaming mag argue about sa past wrong doings ng isa’t isa. Hanggang humantong na sabihin niya na ayaw niya na sa relationship namin and gusto niya ng mag end ito. Now he started ghosting me.

Sa 7 years namin together, i have always been faithful. I asked him why di niya ko mapayagan does he not trust me?

Ngayon, im really numb and confused pano humantong sa ganito. Mali ba na piliin ko ang sarili kong freedom by wanting to go on that trip? Abyg? Was it really a selfish and unfair move towards my
bf?

I (25F) decided to go on a trip with work friends despite of my 7 years and LDR BF (26M) not wanting me to go because of that one workmate he’s been jealous with for 2 years now.

I reassured him that i didn’t care if that one co worker is coming in our group. I just really want to enjoy the trip with my work friends. I really don’t have feelings for him and no matter how I tell him there is nothing going on between us, he’s turning deaf.

BF went so mad and threw a tantrum at me bc he was upset that i didn’t chose to stay with him instead. I wanted to have this freedom for myself because I-don’t want to feel controlled and lose my individuality and social life. Work life has been very draining for the two of us, so I always to join these trips to destress.
I explained this side to him and he called it BS and accused me that I just wanted to have a great time with that one co worker of mine he’s jealous with.

During his tantrums, he insisted that he joins our group trip. I said everything has been booked and settled with the travel agency and i really didn’t want to look like the dramatic and messy one in our work group. In fact, i asked him before the booking if he wanted to go for the nth time he said he don’t want to be fake happy with the group etc. now, i didn’t want to push him into coming w us because it was not his mission/wanting in the first place.

Now, my bf is threatening me to end our relationship. He said that i was selfish and i wasn’t respecting his ego. And that i was not setting enough boundaries with the my co worker he is jealous with. To which i asked throughout our years of relationship have i not been faithful? Does he not have a trust in me?

He said that he wanted us to travel to that place instead and see it for the first time together. He was upset that i was seeing it work friends especially w the guy he is jealous with and not him.

I complained that he never really have the time to travel with me. Because he was always busy hustling and making money for “our future”. It turned into a very ugly discussion. It was so hard to digest. My eyes was all swollen.

He’s started ghosting me now. And im thinking if iata for insisting on going to this trip with work friends :(