u/1009_ke

There is this guy I know who has turned into a bad womaniser.

So, while I was shooting videos and he was doing his medical intern at Kikuyu hospital, he happened to fall in love with one of our regular model/vixen.

I knew the vixen before him. And I am not saying all vixens and models have the same character, but hers was typically what you would imagine.

Now, this guy comes into her life. She was finishing her campus. She had the typical gig economy lifestyle. She was loaded at certain months and broke at certain months. And this time she was really broke, so she moved into the guy's apartment. Medical doctors, even as interns, usually get some good chunk, so he was living comparatively good and he used to really spend on her.

He would come with her to shoots, see other men act with her in very raunchy ways, say nothing. Sometime the shoot would go up to the night, and as a medical intern, he couldn't do a night out, he would leave her and she would keep doing her shenanigans.

Fast foward, she goes into that travel economy thing where girls just pop up on instagram with pictures to Diani, then watamu, then Zanzibar and Kigali. Hers did not Shine to Cape town and Santorini.

The thing is, her boyfriend fell in love with the shoots and he was just coming for the shoots even as the girlfriend was traversing east africa.

The worst thing is that she was still coming home to him. We knew what was happening. The guy was not stupid, he knew what was happening, he was just stupidly in love. The last time he was at our shoot, he was balling with his new mercedes, bought drinks to all the people there and took some vixens numbers.

I guess he is the one taking them to Diani now. I forgot to say, the two broke up. I mean the girl broke up with him when she found the guy she was looking for. And she is not suffering.

There are several tech conventions in Kenya, that, for lack of a better word, have turned out to be failures. I know the objective of every idea is to make a profit, but the needs of stakeholders for for tech conventions is never completely addressed. In 14 days, there will be Africa startup Festival which is one of those conferences, and I already don't see the need to go there.

The pattern is the same for all of them. Have stands, and then have several speakers.

For a startup founder, I am going there to either get investors or showcase the thing to my customers. As an investor, you hope to get very good products there. For a tech user/nerd you just want to also get usable edge-tech.

Now, do the conferences aim to satisfy all these stakeholders’ needs? Hardly. They are all just looking to create a FOMO thing and get you to pay for the tickets and while there you get underwhelmed. 

I have so many areas of improvement I could propose but I guess I should be paid for that. 

I am writing this in TRM at the joint just next to the gate, I don't even know what it is called. I just remember the last time I was here was an unsuccesful second date. The first one was watching that movie with reverse plot called Teken.

Since then life has been moving in reverse. Today I am not in a date, I am not waiting for a date. Since I lost my job I have never been in one.

Girls seem to notice when one is struggling financially. Or maybe it is just me. I have seen girls keep other broke men.

Anyway, today I am not talking about girls and love. It hasn't been in my mind for sometime now. Today I have been thinking about sucess. I have been listening quite a number of inspiration messages. I even realized Kibe nowadays is advising people how to maneuver failure and not how to use their money to make women suffer.

I loved his women suffering lives more. I wanted to get money to just watch women get smaller around me. For a long time it has been the opposite.

Ego. That was what I came to realize was my problem. Or what the world has been telling me. The world wants me to go to a mjengo to show I am trying. I don't know why that has to be the gauge for a trying man. That you have to fail so much that you accept to do things that you are not good at. Sell sweets on the road. Wash sidemirrors. And all that.

I can do them. I don't want to. I won't do them.

I feel the world doesn't understand me when I keep telling it that I have spend so much learning all other skills that mattered at some point and those sacrifices will mean nothing if I put myself that low. Yeah. Maybe I have an ego.

My former boss used to get paid a lot coming to the office once a week, and managing his other businesses on the other days. It was and is still easy for him. I built his business, me and others. He didn’t even know how to sum in excel.

I am not going to wash his side mirrors on the road. I willl first join the wepesi stuff before I decide to willingly push myself to the bottom feeder class. My parents did that willingly. I am not doing that.

At some point there were several speed dating events in Nairobi that always turn out to be disaster, is it a good thing to still organize in 2026 and what would make it successful?

I have a question.

For us self-conscious men, or maybe a sub-section of us, we never date if we are broke/poor/struggling. It is embedded in our DNA to be providers.

But then again, we hate that that is the only thing people see in us, and sometimes we just get into relationship knowing this person is here because of money. And we know that if we ever get broke they will leave. We are at peace with that.

I want to know if women feel the same thing about beauty. Now that some use beauty to set their value in the dating market, do they want to still be treated the same when it starts to wane off years into the relationship? Are they at peace with that?

Sharing a playlist with a girl was one thing I always wanted to do. So when things happened, that I can't recall, and I finally had a girl, I had to create a playlist of songs that I thought would advocate my taste.

It had Sampha, PJ, watendawili, caesar, and Serro.

I honestly feel I was the courted one. It was a surprise, especially when the girl sent the photos and I felt there was something wrong. There was no way I was going from zero to having this gorgeous thing.

And love is a good thing. Especially when you experience it for the first time.

I had just gotten my first job, It wasn't a burden to send the credos and lunch and in turn get told how she loved me.

We planned to meet for some time. She was ready. I wasn't . Real mambas know you always scale. And it is always a matter of when she leaves you after meeting you for the first time and she realizes you were capfishing, tallfishing, anglefishing, and vibefishing.

It felt good just talking and taking things as slow as I could. But then, the meet happened. She was incessant. I had to part with a chunk of my savings to finance that visit.

She was even better in person.

And I honestly knew it was a battle of how long I keep her until another person snatches her.

But we had to start with selling my playlist to her. The best way was to organize a trip. Since I had no car for Tigoni, I planned a Diani thing. It was part budget, part luxury.

She agreed, but was surprised on the day of the trip to only find me alone. She admitted she only agreed because she thought we were going as a group.

She did not like my playlist. She slept the whole trip. Avoided going out on any day occasion. Active at night with requests to go to a live performance and the club.

She did not order expensive stuff though.

She said she did not want to go on the planned activities because she was lazy and tired and just wanted a relaxing trip.

And the trip ended. She did not want me to take her home. She was really understanding.

And since that trip it became hard to get to her. I was enchanted and I wanted to see her, but her work got a lot of customers. That's what she told me. She was busy nearly every day.

She woke up very early and she would answer my morning texts at night with a goodnight. She was really hardworking.

And you know she had started living alone, so her bills went up. Whenever she texted, it was followed by an ask of 1k, then 2k, and soon it was 5k to 10k for her rent.

I did not want the landlord to lock my queen out, so I kept sending. She promised to have my kid. And I saw her as a wife to be.

I even started preparing for things. She had told me she couldn't see me because she did not have time to move across the city to see me. I had to move on their side of city. It was costly. She had talked about the places she needed to live. An estate with a guarded gate and playground. That's where I moved too. It was crushing me financially. I knew that pressure was needed to make me make more money for my queen.

I bought more stuff. A washing machine. Proper furniture. A microwave. Plus the stuff that I had. I went to get a loan for a car. She had talked about not wanting to keep walking.

They approved the loan but I wanted to make sure we go with her to get the car.

She was still busy. I did not want to go to her place of work even though it was a walking distance. She said it may cause her to lose her job. So I kept waiting for the day she finally agrees to meet me.

Months went by. The finance side of me was not going well. It was expensive living on that side of town. Plus she wanted help too many times and we hadn’t met again. I decided on blackmail. Plus most times I did not have money. Anyway, I decided I would only resume sending when we meet. The first time I told her I did not have money. She posted herself on a date.

I felt I needed to prove my worth again. I resumed sending. But it was only a matter of time before I couldn’t do it again. My finance was at the pits. She posted again another date. I couldn’t do anything at that time. I thought she was only playing mind games. A few days passed, and then she posted her new picture. Many months pregnant. Then another one, with supposedly her new whatever.

It was coming. I had felt it. I went to my friends and used all my coins to buy alcohol. We drank, and drank and danced and danced and danced the night away. They did not know what was going on with me. Me too. It was new.

How do you marry someone you don't love when someone you loved was within your grasp?

There is this idea on the kilimani-westlands founders community that a combination of perception, personality and connection is all one needs to create a successful startup.

I used to argue against it but I have come to realize that a huge percentage of people with investment capital are not really intelligent ( in critical thinking terms) and their decision-making is largely emotional.

That's why they keep saying they are investing in a person. They don't know how to rate the viability of an idea. That has created a massive cohort of vibes founders, not vibe coders, that's different.

Vibes founders are people who only remember their idea when they go broke or have people to impress. Those people who sell half-baked products and keep saying I am yet to finish this and this, and want others to invest pre-revenue.

The thing is getting investment is largely connection still but if you have none, you should know that making a startup work is really hard and if you haven't put 30 hours of your 24 hours a day and tried giving up a million times, you aren't there yet.

Kenya calls itself the silicon Savannah. Then there are like 1000 tech people who are always putting themselves like they own the world, lecturing people huko X and huku how microsoft and google are looking for them.

Funny thing is no kenyan has managed a successful tech company. Like build a company to a point where it goes into an IPO. There is not even one.

Banking have done that. Retail have done that. Farmers have done that. Even entertainment have done that.

So the tech people should stop walking around like they know something. Their industry is worse than the music industry.

My YouTube is not monetized. I do mixes which are usually copyrighted. Last week I tried something. On the pinned comment I put my PayPal mail and asked people who love the craft to apperiaciate me for the time. That can look like begging, but I also put a lot of work and has never been paid for work. My Youtube has 22k subscribers. On this video, which currently has 8,850 views, I have received $550 which I was not expecting. This is a new thing and I asking whether I should continue doing this or it is leeching on my viewers?