u/2vrqx

My country has a welfare system for the poor. Through this system, those in need receive approximately $550 per month from the government, and they only have to pay $130 per month for housing. However, this system is strictly limited to the extremely poor or the sick. In particular, support is not available if parents or children own assets. In my case, I cannot receive this support because my father possesses a certain amount of property. However, some people are receiving this assistance by illegally concealing their assets. What is the situation like in your country?

I don't have any friends. I've never had a girlfriend.

I've never had a job, and I don't have any money saved.

The last time I talked to a woman my age—even just exchanging a light joke—was six years ago.

Even after watching a movie or walking down a busy street, the moment I come back to my room, I just feel deeply depressed.

Honestly, I feel like I'm losing my human mind more and more these days.

When my family was sick, I wasn't worried at all. I couldn't feel grateful or sorry.

And even when my sister passed away by suicide a few years ago, and my father went through an incredibly hard time, I moved on quickly. It feels as if she was never here from the beginning.

Of course, I know I was loved by a few people just by virtue of being born. But I couldn't give them that much love in return.

Also, I have never been truly angry in my 23 years of life.

I don't know how to raise my voice, put on an angry face, or express anger.

It doesn't feel like a natural reaction to me. If I were to get angry, I'd probably have to force it with all my might.

Is it because I don't have a human heart?

Is it because I'm a psychopath?

Is that why I'm so lonely tonight?