Hello🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 just recreationally 😢 lately ive been dealing with a lot of big thoughts and i want to do some rigorous exercise. Im bad at it but i played in hs for fun😭 im a rising sophomore in nursing plz hmu if ur interested
Hello. I am doing nursing at temple and i'm an international student. Everyday I commute to temple and cross 30th street, and think I lost my chance of even getting rejected because of how bad my high school grades were. My mom died when I was 17 and I lived with my aunt who was not supportive of anything at all. My mental health fell thru the gaps and well I was irresponsible with my studies. I might have adhd but i've never gotten tested for it. My dad passed away last winter break. I really wanted to make a transfer application to penn using my freshman year grades- but my dad got sick during finals week and I had to leave the U.S. skipping or deferring a lot of the important exams. But yeah. My grades were again not up to penn mark. I can do the application next year but that would mean I'll have to do one extra year at penn for the same rn license. I know I haven't done exceptionally well at temple yet- but I don't feel academically challenged. The second a try a little bit I become better than others. I'll try out the honors college to see if anything changes but for the nursing program at temple- there is no honors. There's just everything with a "let me just pass" mentality. This is basically a rant but also maybe a rant for advice? I feel so bad because I feel like I've betrayed myself. Now I can't even know for sure what my worth is. And this not knowing eats me up. I can't tell myself this is good enough and no one cares where you go to nursing school. I have an immature hate for good enough things. Now I need all the 22 year olds in the world to line up and see where I stand. I also feel like a hypocrite because I feel temple is beneath what I could've gotten. Isn't the truth that this is what I deserve? If anything maybe I'm even beneath everyone that goes to temple. Just because I'm sharp that doesn't mean they're not academically successful right? They are, and I'm not. And in my shame, i'm still left hoping for more- better- best.
Can anyone give relevant advice? I'll entertain all sorts of discourse. Thanks😭
I come from a brown family and my parents are dead. I live with my sister and brother in law and am pursuing nursuing as an intl student in the U.S. BIL is investment analyst and sister did accounting at big 4 before she moved from canada. All of our family friend kids are doing stuff like medicine, dental school etc. One guy there is going to do investment banking in nyc and went to cornell. Now, my self image has taken a big hit after i've made myself a victim to outside comparison. I feel like I'll never make it big enough. I don't think i feel comfortable with the nurse stigma my community has even though I insisted I don't care. I'm so short on money and I have to commute 1.5 hrs everyday. I have no social life and pretty much these brown events are all i have and that doesnt help me. I cant even say no to these because these are events from my sister's in laws side. And i'm at a severe stretch for money because the money I inherited from my parents has not been processed yet. I can only have a job if it's on campus. And campus is far. My mental health has taken a hit since my dad dying in december and my sister doesn't understand bc she didnt get along with him. I'm struggling! I have sought out school counselling and I only have one free session left. I don't have the money to do therapy and even if i did i would have to do it in secret because my sister is not only nosy, but also forces her opinions on me. We have to go back to our country but that's contingent on my sister's green card. If she doesnt get it during summer break, i would have to ask my paternal aunt for money for next semester tuition- which i don't want. I feel suffocated and helpless. I've applied for jobs on campus but the money you need to go on the train to campus is also expensive. $17 round trip everyday and there's no summer semester pass.
I dont rly know what to say here because that's just too much stuff going on. If anyone has any logical reasoning as to how i should manage my internal ramblings and newfound insecurities - please lmk