u/AIolanMarowak

even if i’m just talking to myself alone in my room. but it’s much much worse when im interacting with other people in any way whatsoever. even an interaction as simple as a smile, wave and quick hello when im passing by a neighbor on a walk will replay over and over until i shake my head really violently or tell myself to shut up and die out loud, which usually knocks me out of my thought loops somehow. i try to substitute telling myself to die or kms with something less destructive when i can because i don’t actually want to die, its just an automatic response i have for some reason and usually the first thing that comes to mind. the loop will continue endlessly if i dont interrupt it, typically with something physical, hence the shaking my head and saying phrases out loud. i experience variations of this all day every day, its mentally exhausting and genuinely takes up so much time i could be using to think about more important things. im not particularly looking for advice, im more wondering if others can relate to this, but advice is still welcome if you have any lol