u/A_Potato_Sloth

Hello Reddit! I'm a first time poster, long time lurker via YouTube with the transition to Reddit recently.

I was thinking back on an old story from when I was 5 years old (F27 currently) and thought this would be a funny story to tell and get my booty read for being so stupid. Buckle up potatoes cause this is a wild(ly stupid) one!

For context, I live in the UK so some words I use may be different from the US/Canadian language. I also have dyslexia so apologies in advance for any mistakes or confusing words.

So flash back to my dumb self at 5 years old. It was school time and I was in primary 1. I was a big girl who finally left nursery and was in 'real school'. I believe this took place roughly in the fall/winter time 2003 as I wore my white polo shirt and grey skirt with thick wooly tights during the incident (I usually wore a school green checkered summer dress during spring and summer if the weather allowed it). I had just gotten home from school and was playing upstairs as the weather outside was doing its usual Scottish down pours.

My siblings were all downstairs doing whatever, most likely watching TV with the parents whilst waiting on dinner. I got bored and then remembered watching Peter Pan on video with the classic LIE "If you think happy thoughts you can fly!".

Now I didn't have pixy dust but to be honest I didn't even think about that. My little smooth brain focused solely on the happy thoughts magically converting into me being able to fly around my siblings and my bedroom. So without any hesitation I climb onto the top of one of the bunk beds and begin thinking my happy thoughts!

Now I should explain that the house had three bedrooms. At the time there was my parents bedroom, a toy room and the kids bedroom that had two sets of bunk beds at either side of the room. This left a small but decent enough space between the two for moving about the place (as we got older we were separated into two bedrooms with two kids in each room. All my siblings were female).

My goal was to jump off the top of the left bunk bed and fly my way over to the top right. So after conjuring my happy thoughts I leapt off the bed and flew...for about 1-2 seconds.

I very quickly went crashing into the right bunk bed, fell backwards and smashed my head case off the left bunk beds ladders all the way down till I crashed onto the floor, whacking my right big toe off the beds during the process.

I immediately started crying and ran downstairs telling my parents about my flight failure and that I had hurt my big toe. My dad was looking at it (it was bleeding slightly but no major injuries there...) when my mum noticed that my snow white polo shirt was completely drenched red at the back. Subtlety my mum said "Abigail come over for a moment please". So I toddled my lil booty over and she parted my hairline and there was a big old crack on my head with fresh red blood leaking out. I had very thick curly hair as a child and I don't remember my head hurting so that's most likely why I didn't notice it. That and the injury was on the back of my head.

My mum, horrified, rushed me to A&E to get me checked. Thankfully it wasn't severe but I did have a concussion and got to stay off school while it healed. I was weirdly happy about that.

Now that I'm 27 and still incredibly clumsy, I think back to that memory and cringe at my younger self stupidity for actually thinking and believing I could fly cause happy thoughts = fly. Obviously I now know better but firmly believe there should have been a warning on old Disney movies that let children know not to actually attempt this. Although I'm sure Disney didn't expect an idiot like me to actually try it.

I can laugh at myself now and see it as a funny story to tell at parties or even on the dating scene if I feel like it'll get the laugh it deserves.

I have plenty of other stupid stories where I have accidentally injured myself through my own stupid means. If you wanna hear more I'm happy to share! I will say I am grateful for my parents, especially since my mum is a certified nurse. I probably wouldn't be alive to this day without them.

TL;DR I tried to fly at age 5 and split my head open. Thanks for letting me share!

Hello Reddit! I'm a first time poster, long time lurker via YouTube with the transition to Reddit recently.

I was thinking back on an old story from when I was 5 years old (F27 currently) and thought this would be a funny story to tell and get my booty read for being so stupid. Buckle up potatoes cause this is a wild(ly stupid) one!

For context, I live in the UK so some words I use may be different from the US/Canadian language etc. I also have dyslexia so apologies in advance for any mistakes or confusing words.

So flash back to my dumb self at 5 years old. It was school time and I was in primary 1. I was a big girl who finally left nursery and was in 'real school'. I believe this took place roughly in the fall/winter time 2003 as I wore my white polo shirt and grey skirt with thick wooly tights during the incident (I usually wore a school green checkered summer dress during spring and summer if the weather allowed it). I had just gotten home from school and was playing upstairs as the weather outside was doing its usual Scottish down pours.

My siblings were all downstairs doing whatever, most likely watching TV with the parents whilst waiting on dinner. I got bored and then remembered watching Peter Pan on video with the classic LIE "If you think happy thoughts you can fly!".

Now I didn't have pixy dust but to be honest I didn't even think about that. My little smooth brain focused solely on the happy thoughts magically converting into me being able to fly around my siblings and my bedroom. So without any hesitation I climb onto the top of one of the bunk beds and begin thinking my happy thoughts!

Now I should explain that the house had three bedrooms. At the time there was my parents bedroom, a toy room and the kids bedroom that had two sets of bunk beds at either side of the room. This left a small but decent enough space between the two for moving about the place (as we got older we were separated into two bedrooms with two kids in each room. All my siblings were female).

My goal was to jump off the top of the left bunk bed and fly my way over to the top right. So after conjuring my happy thoughts I leapt off the bed and flew...for about 1-2 seconds.

I very quickly went crashing into the right bunk bed, fell backwards and smashed my head case off the left bunk beds ladders all the way down till I crashed onto the floor, whacking my right big toe off the beds during the process.

I immediately started crying and ran downstairs telling my parents about my flight failure and that I had hurt my big toe. My dad was looking at it (it was bleeding slightly but no major injuries there...) when my mum noticed that my snow white polo shirt was completely drenched red at the back. Subtlety my mum said "Abigail come over for a moment please". So I toddled my lil booty over and she parted my hairline and there was a big old crack on my head with fresh red blood leaking out. I had very thick curly hair as a child and I don't remember my head hurting so that's most likely why I didn't notice it. That and the injury was on the back of my head.

My mum, horrified, rushed me to A&E to get me checked. Thankfully it wasn't severe but I did have a concussion and got to stay off school while it healed. I was weirdly happy about that.

Now that I'm 27 and still incredibly clumsy, I think back to that memory and cringe at my younger self stupidity for actually thinking and believing I could fly cause happy thoughts = fly. Obviously I now know better but firmly believe there should have been a warning on old Disney movies that let children know not to actually attempt this. Although I'm sure Disney didn't expect an idiot like me to actually try it.

I can laugh at myself now and see it as a funny story to tell at parties or even on the dating scene if I feel like it'll get the laugh it deserves.

I have plenty of other stupid stories where I have accidentally injured myself through my own stupid means. If you wanna hear more I'm happy to share! I will say I am grateful for my parents, especially since my mum is a certified nurse. I probably wouldn't be alive to this day without them.

Thanks for letting me share! Have an awesome rest of your weekend!