I know I have done a huge mistake, but don't know how to get out of it. (19M)(19F)(20F)
Hello, I'm an engineering student (in a top tier engineering college) from Delhi but study in a university far away from here. There is a girl in my batch, she is very nice and we really get along well. It's our 3rd semester so we know each other for a fairly long time. We study together in the library, hang out, go to shopping and movies. Now a few days back we kissed and got really intimate, not an intercourse but everything else. I won't go into detail. I think I kind of like her too. And she even proposed me.
But now the catch is that I already had a girlfriend in Delhi. We were in the same school, different classes but same coaching. We prepared together for the entrance exams. And under those circumstances we got really close. I told her that I have feelings for her and she said that she also reciprocates the same. Even my parents know her (but mot that we are in a relationship). It was kind of a platonic relationship and she was really straightforward & serious about her studies so we never got physical. After the exams, she got into a college in Delhi and I got admission somewhere else (a top tier engineering college BTW). Since then we have grown slightly apart but we still talk very often and I don't think there's any change in her feelings towards me.
I have to make a choice. Now my wisdom says that I should choose the newer girl because we got physical and seen her without clothes. But I have borrowed some money from my older gorl, the amount is around 40K. My parents maintain a very strict control on my finances, because they think I tend to do reckless spending. Her parents are more liberal in this aspect and she is rich also, so I used to borrow from her whenever I needed money. The amount gradually compounded. I don't really have money so I can't pay her back. So, if I now break up with her, I'm afraid she may ask for money, even if she doesn't ask; I think its my duty to return the money considering I even borrowed money from her recently to take the newer college girl to movies (Dhurandhar and Project Hail Mary) and shopping. I can't tell the truth to either of them. And She even knows my parents so in case I refuse to return money or beg some more time, she can tell my parents and my parents will kill me. She even pays visits to my home regularly to meet my parents and check on them as my brother also lives outside of Delhi
I know I have done a huge mistake by borrowing money from her instead of my parents and curbing my expenses. I should not have done that. I really don't know what to do. If someone elder here can suggest something, it would be really helpful.
