u/Academic-Play1622

I have struggled my whole life with motivation for anything; cleaning, exercising, homework, whatever it is, I just can’t get myself motivated. Now, as an adult, it’s even worse.

How do people become motivated to make changes? I want to be one of those people that wakes up one day and decides to make a change.

I’ve made decisions to change multiple times, but I never follow through. I think I struggle with the belief that I will just fail. I can’t fail if I don’t start, which isn’t true because it’s a failure to not start.

I’ve been in therapy trying to deal with my trauma and self worth, and I so badly want to work on my mental and physical health. I just don’t know where to start. I’ve read self help books, I’ve done the apps, I journal, and sure, it sounds great but it’s like I’m missing something in my brain to get motivated (not sure that makes sense).

I just don’t know what to do.

I have struggled my whole life with motivation for anything; cleaning, exercising, homework, whatever it is, I just can’t get myself motivated. Now, as an adult, it’s even worse.

How do people become motivated to make changes? I want to be one of those people that wakes up one day and decides to make a change.

I’ve made decisions to change multiple times, but I never follow through. I think I struggle with the belief that I will just fail. I can’t fail if I don’t start, which isn’t true because it’s a failure to not start.

I so badly want to work on my mental and physical health. I just don’t know where to start. I’ve read self help books, I’ve done the apps, I journal, and sure, it sounds great but it’s like I’m missing something in my brain to get motivated (not sure that makes sense).

I just don’t know what to do.

I have struggled my whole life with motivation for anything; cleaning, exercising, homework, whatever it is, I just can’t get myself motivated. Now, as an adult, it’s even worse.

How do people become motivated to make changes? I want to be one of those people that wakes up one day and decides to make a change.

I’ve made decisions to change multiple times, but I never follow through. I think I struggle with the belief that I will just fail. I can’t fail if I don’t start, which isn’t true because it’s a failure to not start.

I’ve been in therapy trying to deal with my trauma and self worth, and I so badly want to work on my mental and physical health. I just don’t know where to start. I’ve read self help books, I’ve done the apps, I journal, and sure, it sounds great but it’s like I’m missing something in my brain to get motivated (not sure that makes sense).

I just don’t know what to do.

I had an abortion 5 months ago. I would have been due at the end of August, and I'm just stuck in this endless cycle of what could have been.

Back story, I have PCOS and was 97.6% sure that I couldn't get pregnant. I have been f*** buddies with a guy for 7 years, and I got forgetful with my birth control. The thing with the guy is, he's in a relationship and has a kid. I still have not told him. Obviously, there's some feelings, at least from me about this dude already. I just didn't/don't want to complicate things further. Also, I have been pretty stuck on not wanting kids.

So, I made what I thought was the best decision, given my situation and feelings. I found out that I was pregnant at 3 months, so I didn't have much time to make a decision. Less than a week later, I took the pills to have the abortion.

Recently, I have been thinking a lot about the abortion. I decided to get an IUD, and I'm 33 years old, so now I keep thinking about the fact that this could be the only time I'll ever get pregnant. I think about what it would have been like to have a baby, if the baby would have been a boy or a girl, etc.

I know I made the best decision, and I don't regret it, but I just am sick of feeling like something is missing or something. I can't explain it.