u/AdCommon3191

I feel very stuck in a family that tolerates my father’s angry and abusive outbursts (they all hate him, but they put up with his anger due to familial loyalty, which is very ingrained in my cultural background, and they pity him because he had a neglectful and abusive family himself). They also essentially blame this cycle of built up rage on how me and another sibling avoids interacting with him, “treating him like a ghost while under his roof,” in his words. It has been this way since first grade when my parents were separated for some time before we all moved  in with one another. My resentment started ever since the first time he was verbally violent and throwing objects at my mother. My mother has always advised me not to instigate him by “ignoring” him ever since I was eight years old. But honestly, it’s more like I don’t know how to talk to him, since his pent up aggression also results from other random inconveniences. I thought that limiting interaction towards him was a good solution, but I think that my judgement was wrong.
While I have no other feelings but hatred for him, I acknowledge that he is a hard worker with a shitty job and has played a significant part in providing me with a privileged life. There were some points  where I tried to say hi or talk to him more to prevent him from taking out his anger on other family members (especially after not going with my family to visit him at the hospital when he had a serious medical diagnosis). He has no support system outside of our family, and that’s why he wants his “love” to be reciprocated so much, since me and my one other sibling try to remain distant, I mean as much as we can considering we still live in the same house.
To preface, I am currently in college (that I commute to, not dorming), however I don’t have the means to move out and actually, the recent outbursts stem from my unemployment over the summer and in general, what I’ll do after graduation (my other sibling is also facing the same problem). I have been scouring and applying for jobs and other opportunities, but I’ve had little to no luck. Which has made me feel guilty about this because I know that his anger impacts the rest of the family. My mom and my older sibling told us recently about treating him nicer, and to understand how pitiful his situation is, where he comes home and his two of his children won’t talk to him after a late shift at work. 
Which makes this situation complicated because I agree with what my father has said about me about being sheltered and privileged (in comparison to his childhood), and how I am financially dependent on my parents and need to grow up. Which is why I’ve come here for some guidance.
I don’t know how to navigate this situation. I know that my father is aware that me and my sibling hate him, and I don’t think there is any way of erasing that from his head. I know that moving away might exacerbate his anger issues (I don’t want to leave my mom with him), and I’ve tried being cordial with him, but I don’t think I can just be normal around my father without thinking that I’m walking around eggshells or remembering the times where he was violent around and at me. I know I should just grow up since my other family members (whether it was abuse from my father to having a very abusive childhood) have dealt with worse abuse than periodical ones like this. I can tolerate him for my family’s sake, but I need help with how I should go about it.
Sorry about the ramble, this recent outburst was very violent and me and my sibling believe that it is essentially our fault. For me, I feel like I am his source of anger nowadays, and he’ll find any excuse to take it out on my mom. I can’t help but feel selfish, because my family has to deal with the aftermath and do all the emotional labor of placating him, while I’m here, asking for advice and struggling to do my part of at least pacifying him so that he doesn’t hurt my family.
In the meantime, I will continue applying to any job around my area and internship to build financial independence.

This was a really dumb mistake, but I dropped off a speedx packages out of habit at an USPS (I didn’t realize it was among the other usps packages I dropped off until the morning after, which is today!).
I’ve read up on similar situations where UPS/Fedex packages eventually reach their locations as they usually get handed off to the right carriers.
However, I am not sure if that applies in this situation since Speedx doesn’t work in tandem with USPS.
I am going in early today in hopes that it might be there. If it’s not, my assumption is that the package may be sent back to me or the recipient with postage dues.
I need advice or any other related experience that can at least let me know that the package may not get lost.
I am very sorry if this the incorrect subreddit to post in!
I have to also say, I am literally dreading going to post office because it had to be lowest rated one in walking distance (literally 1 stars across the board)- it’s notoriously bad in terms of the attitude of the staff.