Hi all,
What pillows are people using?
And what mattresses too?
I'm about 15 years post op with T2 - L4 fused, no major issues really I've been blessed but recently I've been waking up with the worst neck pain / shoulder blade pain.
Keen to know what everyone uses before I start spending money on something that may or may not work!
Thanks
I understand this may not be the usual type of post for this community, but I’m hoping there may be someone here who has been through something similar or can offer some perspective from experience.
My mother lives alone in rural Ireland. She is only 53 years old and has FND (Functional Neurological Disorder) alongside a long history of mental health struggles, including what I believe is manic depression/bipolar-type episodes.
She has spoken about suicidal thoughts on and off for years, so this is sadly not something entirely new, but recently she has become significantly more depressed, has started reducing her antidepressants herself, and has begun smoking cannabis again.
She currently has a carer who comes for 1 hour per day, but I honestly do not think this is sustainable long term given how isolated she is and how much she seems to be deteriorating emotionally.
The biggest issue is that she lives completely alone in a very rural area with almost no support nearby. I live over 5 hours away, my brother works full time, and most family members are at least 3 hours away minimum. Moving in with me is unfortunately not an option due to personal and practical circumstances, and she completely refuses to move closer to family.
I feel trapped because I know she would hate me forever if I forced her into some kind of home or supported accommodation, but at the same time I genuinely feel like she is slowly withering away in that house and the current arrangement is not sustainable for anyone involved.
I’m trying to understand:
- what realistic options actually exist in Ireland for someone in this situation
- whether there are supported living/assisted living options for younger adults with FND and mental health issues
- how families handled situations where someone refused help or refused to relocate
- whether anyone has experience with HSE mental health services in rural areas
- at what point people considered hospital admission or more formal intervention
I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has gone through something similar.
I’m looking for advice from anyone who has dealt with severe mental health issues in a parent living alone in rural Ireland with FND.
My mother lives alone in rural Galway. She is only 53 years old and has FND (Functional Neurological Disorder) alongside a long history of mental health struggles, including what I believe is manic depression/bipolar-type episodes.
She has spoken about suicidal thoughts on and off for years, so this is sadly not something entirely new, but recently she has become significantly more depressed, has started reducing her antidepressants herself, and has begun smoking cannabis again and unfortunately has had FND for the last 5 years which has taken any bit of independence she had left away from her.
She currently has a carer who comes for 1 hour per day, but I honestly do not think this is sustainable long term given how isolated she is and how much she seems to be deteriorating emotionally.
The biggest issue is that she lives completely alone in a very rural area with almost no support nearby. I live over 5 hours away, my brother works full time (lives with her but is away for most of the week) and most family members are at least 3 hours away minimum. Moving in with me is unfortunately not an option due to personal and practical circumstances, and she completely refuses to move closer to family.
I feel trapped because I know she would hate me forever if I forced her into some kind of home or supported accommodation, but at the same time I genuinely feel like she is slowly withering away in that house and the current arrangement is not sustainable for anyone involved.
I’m trying to understand:
- what realistic options actually exist in Ireland for someone in this situation
- whether there are supported living/assisted living options for younger adults with FND and mental health issues
- how families handled situations where someone refused help or refused to relocate
- whether anyone has experience with HSE mental health services in rural areas
- at what point people considered hospital admission or more formal intervention
I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has gone through something similar.
I understand this may not be the usual type of post for this community, but I’m hoping there may be someone here who has been through something similar or can offer some perspective from experience.
Thank you.
​
Context: We run 6 apartments in the same building (mix of 2-bed and 3-bed units). One cleaner has handled them for the last 2 years.
Typical workload:
Around 70% of the year: 2–3 turnovers per day
Peak days: up to 6 turnovers
Main issue: The quality is inconsistent.
Some cleans are excellent. Other times we get poor reviews for:
Smelly bed linen or towels
Glass/debris on floor
Floors not swept properly
Dirty bathrooms
Surfaces missed / not wiped down
Pattern: When we raise it, she is very apologetic and improves for a short period, then standards drop again.
What I’ve already done:
Bought an extra dryer to reduce laundry bottlenecks
Created a checklist/SOP for each clean
Given repeated feedback with examples
Tried to be flexible because she helps out with urgent/out-of-hours issues, which has real value
Why I’m conflicted: She has been loyal and helpful, so I don’t want to just replace her. But bad reviews directly hurt the business, and from a scaling perspective the current setup doesn’t seem sustainable.
What I need advice on:
Is this a systems/process issue or a people issue?
How do you manage cleaner accountability without constant micromanagement?
Would you split units across 2 cleaners?
Do you inspect every clean?
Is pay structure/incentives usually the real issue?
How do you handle laundry quality control at scale?
At what point do you stop trying to fix it and move on?
Extra context: Most units are in the same building, so travel time between jobs is minimal. On busy days not every apartment checks in immediately, so there is usually some flexibility on timing.
Would appreciate advice from hosts or cleaning managers who’ve solved this properly.
​
Context:
We run 6 apartments in the same building (mix of 2-bed and 3-bed units). One cleaner has handled them for the last 2 years.
Typical workload:
- Around 70% of the year: 2–3 turnovers per day
- Peak days: up to 6 turnovers
Main issue:
The quality is inconsistent.
Some cleans are excellent. Other times we get poor reviews for:
- Smelly bed linen or towels
- Glass/debris on floor
- Floors not swept properly
- Dirty bathrooms
- Surfaces missed / not wiped down
Pattern:
When we raise it, she is very apologetic and improves for a short period, then standards drop again.
What I’ve already done:
- Bought an extra dryer to reduce laundry bottlenecks
- Created a checklist/SOP for each clean
- Given repeated feedback with examples
- Tried to be flexible because she helps out with urgent/out-of-hours issues, which has real value
Why I’m conflicted:
She has been loyal and helpful, so I don’t want to just replace her. But bad reviews directly hurt the business, and from a scaling perspective the current setup doesn’t seem sustainable.
What I need advice on:
- Is this a systems/process issue or a people issue?
- How do you manage cleaner accountability without constant micromanagement?
- Would you split units across 2 cleaners?
- Do you inspect every clean?
- Is pay structure/incentives usually the real issue?
- How do you handle laundry quality control at scale?
- At what point do you stop trying to fix it and move on?
Extra context:
Most units are in the same building, so travel time between jobs is minimal. On busy days not every apartment checks in immediately, so there is usually some flexibility on timing.
Would appreciate advice from hosts or cleaning managers who’ve solved this properly.
​
Context:
We run 6 apartments in the same building (mix of 2-bed and 3-bed units). One cleaner has handled them for the last 2 years.
Typical workload:
- Around 70% of the year: 2–3 turnovers per day
- Peak days: up to 6 turnovers
Main issue:
The quality is inconsistent.
Some cleans are excellent. Other times we get poor reviews for:
- Smelly bed linen or towels
- Glass/debris on floor
- Floors not swept properly
- Dirty bathrooms
- Surfaces missed / not wiped down
Pattern:
When we raise it, she is very apologetic and improves for a short period, then standards drop again.
What I’ve already done:
- Bought an extra dryer to reduce laundry bottlenecks
- Created a checklist/SOP for each clean
- Given repeated feedback with examples
- Tried to be flexible because she helps out with urgent/out-of-hours issues, which has real value
Why I’m conflicted:
She has been loyal and helpful, so I don’t want to just replace her. But bad reviews directly hurt the business, and from a scaling perspective the current setup doesn’t seem sustainable.
What I need advice on:
- Is this a systems/process issue or a people issue?
- How do you manage cleaner accountability without constant micromanagement?
- Would you split units across 2 cleaners?
- Do you inspect every clean?
- Is pay structure/incentives usually the real issue?
- How do you handle laundry quality control at scale?
- At what point do you stop trying to fix it and move on?
Extra context:
Most units are in the same building, so travel time between jobs is minimal. On busy days not every apartment checks in immediately, so there is usually some flexibility on timing.
Would appreciate advice from hosts or cleaning managers who’ve solved this properly.