u/Adventurous_Bar6495

Hello all. A little background about myself: I’m a U.S.-born and raised American who is ethnically 100% Filipino. Both of my parents are from Negros Occidental. English is my primary language, and while I can fully understand Ilonggo/Hiligaynon, I struggle with speaking it since I sound heavily Americanized and sometimes can’t think of the words I want to say on the spot. I sound ridiculous when I try, lol. I grew up relatively well-off in the US suburbs and am about to enter my final year of university in the United States. I’m currently in Bacolod for summer vacation.

Growing up, I visited the Philippines pretty often — usually every other year, or at the very least every four years. But as a kid, I never really tried to understand the country’s deeper dynamics. To me, it was just the place where my extended family lived and where I could play with my cousins, fireworks, and eat new stuff, etc. I’ve been lurking around this subreddit for a while now, and during this visit I wanted to take the opportunity to really observe and understand the country more deeply while staying at our home here in Bacolod.

Just as a disclaimer: this isn’t meant to criticize Bacolod or the Philippines. These are simply observations and opinions from someone who grew up in a completely different environment.

One thing I’ll say first: people here in Bacolod generally seem very friendly and approachable. Aside from a few experiences, most interactions I’ve had have been positive. I have noticed occasional side-eyes or curious looks when I ask for directions in English, but I assume that’s pretty normal given the relatively homogenous population and local dialect.

One random thing I noticed: some Filipino men here tend to have a slightly higher-pitched or nasal speaking voice. I’m guessing it has something to do with Ilonggo phonics or speech patterns, but I just found it interesting since I sound completely different, lol.

Traffic flow here is also probably one of the biggest culture shocks to me. As far as I can tell, traffic is just nonstop chaos with a very loose concept of right-of-way. I’d probably shit myself trying to drive here. It’s pretty scary lmfao. Very different from the States.

Another thing I noticed is how huge vape culture seems to be among Filipino youth. There are vape bars and vape cafés everywhere, and almost everyone around my age seems to vape. It definitely happens in the States too, but it’s usually more taboo there and people often get clowned for it. My assumption is that vaping is replacing the older Filipino cigarette culture as the “better” alternative?

But I think the biggest elephant in the room is just the very clear wealth gap.

For example, I walk outside SM and immediately see slums across the street. Earlier today, I went for a stroll downtown and saw hardworking, decent people doing their best just to make a living. But then you walk into a “nice” area/restaurant/hotel and suddenly there’s a very distinct social class present. The contrast feels impossible to ignore, whether its in Manila or a smaller city like Bacolod.

Nearly every cousin I’ve talked to has the ultimate goal of leaving the country. To simply put it, they hate it here. I think that’s what really hit me emotionally. From an outsider’s perspective, it feels like the Philippines has so much potential, yet so many Filipinos still feel like their best chance at a good future is diminished or somewhere else.

I was also discussing gas prices with a relative. Gas is around $4.70 per gallon right now in the US. It’s a pain in the ass, but somewhat manageable for most people. Over here though? My cousin said the prices were “genuinely fucking terrible.” Traffic doesn’t seem to have died down though, so I’m curious how are normal people still affording daily life here?

I genuinely hope I get to see a developed Philippines in my lifetime. But rampant corruption makes that dream feel distant sometimes — project scandals, political dynasties, and the constant divide between rich and poor. Eventually things have to improve… right? Thailand, Vietnam, Malaysia are all progressing to become economic powers in Southeast Asia while the Philippines is left in this shitty cycle.

Idk. Maybe I don’t know shit. Maybe I’m an out of touch American and should stay in my own lane. But being here brings out a side of me that feels deeply passionate about my heritage, and because of that, it’s hard for me to ignore the realities I’m seeing.

What are your thoughts? Feel free to ask questions, drop feedback, or simply recommend places around the city. I just thought this would make for an interesting discussion. Thanks! :)

Edit: Clarity/Grammar