u/AdviceDanimals

This year has been pretty off and on for me in terms of quitting. I was doing well in January but had a chance to score some flower for cheap and foolishly bought an ounce "for safe keeping for the long term future". It went about as well as you can imagine and I had 2 relapses of smoking every day for 3 weeks in a row. Overall there's been a lot of progress compared to last year, but I really want a clean break.

It doesn't help that my job has been so stressful lately, but honestly coming home and smoking immediately makes me feel more trapped in the job because it was taking up almost all of my sober time.

There's been some changes in my life recently. I just ended my relationship and it feels very important to me not to go back to smoking as a way of avoiding processing the emotions that come with that. It sucks, it's very hard, but my mind has been much clearer lately.

I'm proud of myself for throwing out my pipe, dugout box, grinder, and all the other tools of the trade. I talked myself out of getting rid of these for so long because I spent money on them but I was finally able to let them go the day after the breakup. It felt like a "now or never" moment.

So here we go- i'm determined to proceed into single life with the wind at my back. I'm so sick of being constantly tired, unmotivated, and lazy. I really think this could lead to a lot of growth even if there's a lot of pain in the short term.