Carrying More Than I Show
I’ve experienced several traumatic events in my life that I stayed silent about for many years, including sexual assault and a past emotionally unhealthy relationship that was controlling in ways I didn’t understand at the time. I also work in a field where I’m regularly exposed to domestic violence and trauma, which has added to what I carry emotionally.
I’m currently in a healthy, stable relationship, but I’ve come to realize that my past experiences still affect how I respond to closeness, trust, and emotional safety. At times, I withdraw or become distant when fear takes over, even when I know I am safe.
I’m sharing this because I’m starting to understand the importance of healing and unlearning survival patterns I developed over time. I’m working on becoming more self-aware, more open, and kinder to myself as I navigate this process.