AITAH for confronting someone who owed me money at a wedding?
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TL;DR: This man ghosted me for a month despite a couple of followups, I asked him quietly towards the end of dinner during the reception when he planned on paying me, he called me names, then he paid me my $400.
Longer version but I'll try to keep it short. Happy to provide details in the comments
My friend who got married didn't have a bridal party so she asked me if I would plan her bachelorette party. I said if she picked out the weekend and Airbnb that I would do the rest. She created a group chat with all the attendees (herself, 2 of her friends, myself, and 3 of "our" friends that I'd introduced her to). The wedding was an expensive destination wedding to attend so prior to booking anything, I texted a group chat without the bride and said, "hey, [this type of bachelorette] is what the bride wants. The bachelorette weekend will likely be ~$500pp, is that ok? Feel free to text me privately." I got resounding yes's so I went ahead and started booking and planning.
You guys, I tried so hard to keep this a budget event because I knew the wedding was costing each of us thousands of dollars to attend between flights, hotels, PTO, etc. I planned far enough in advance that I was able to find budget decorations, went to Costco for alcohol, one of my friends brought games, etc. The bride wanted a beach day so we didn't even have expensive activities planned except for a nice dinner, which everyone had agreed on the restaurant beforehand (or rather, I sent the link, asked if it worked for everyone, and got a couple of yes's and mostly no response). I also didn't include costs for decorations that I kept after, like a backdrop stand thingy used for pictures.
The weekend happened and the friend, Zack, sucked for several reasons including snarking me when I asked him if he was still ok to drive to dinner after I saw how much he drank during the day. Other than driving the bride and me to pick up a coffee order I placed (because his car was at the end of the narrow driveway; we'd offered to do a car shuffle), I don't think he even put his dishes in the sink. He was wildly unhelpful and he and the bride spent most of the weekend among themselves. Some other rude/frustrating things happened but for the sake of brevity I'll just say that he was a deeply unpleasant and selfish person.
Anyway, weekend ends, I text the group chat what they owe and where to send it. Total was ~$400pp. My friends (& the bride, she had agreed to contribute too to keep costs lower for everyone) paid right away. Her other friend paid after a few days. Zack never paid.
I followed up with him individually after a week. Then found his Venmo through his phone number and sent a request a few days later. Then another follow up text a week after that with no response. I kept it polite and understanding. Finally I texted the group chat with the bride, as nicely as I could manage saying, hey sorry not sure if you saw my texts but could you please pay me when you get a chance?
The bride texted me separately saying basically "he doesn't do well when pressured. I'll talk to him but can you please keep the peace?" It was a week and a half from the wedding at that point so I let it go. Kept nice during getting ready, the wedding, cocktail hour, and most of dinner. Lots of people in general were walking around and chatting with others during dinner so I didn't look out of place going next to him (he was at my table, bride's table was far away) and I quietly asked him when he planned on paying me.
He WENT OFF. He had every excuse in the book. "I don't have the money", "I'll pay you when I get paid", "I don't have Venmo on my phone", "you're seriously doing this now?", "you were a bitch that whole weekend", "$400 is too much", etc. His excuses became personal attacks and reasons why he shouldn't have to pay so I'm pretty sure he planned on never paying me.
After he told me "bitch go sit down" multiple times and I didn't (I would've died from old age standing there after he told me that), *he* stormed off. I dropped it at that point, stress cried from confrontation, then enjoyed the rest of my night. I saw he had completed my Venmo request after I got back to my hotel that night and he sent me a catty message calling me childish and telling me to enjoy my life so thankfully this has been resolved.
My friends at the wedding/who went to the bachelorette told me I handled it well and did a good job navigating his personal attacks and that he sucks but of course they'd tell me that. Should I have let it go and just taken him to small claims court when I got home instead? Because that was my next course of action. AITAH?
Edit: sorry for the confusion!! Zack is the bride's close friend from high school and he is gay, which is why he was included on the bach trip.