Working on it still...... obviously. Have to let my IPad charge before I work on it again.
Don't worry, Jack and I are still together. I just feel like he deserves to graduate into something more unearthly. Or ethereal. Because he's taking such good care of me.
And we saw a rainbow at night because there was barely any light.
The picture looks really light because of the stupid night vision on the camera. But it was really dark out yet you could see a rainbow 🌈!
I tried to video the chain lightning but mother nature didn't cooperate very well. Figures 😂.
Anyway, nothing beats cuddling and watching thunderstorms 😊
Goodnight everyone. Hope everyone had a good time with their f/os today.
I did with Jack, until my body decided it needed more 🙄 but eh, whatever. I cried a bit, but I cuddled with my doll and fell asleep. Nothing helps like a heartbeat toy from a dog plush and a heating pad. 😊 And soft fabric on my doll.
Love my Jack doll. He's so cuddly.
This is what happens when I clean and find things.......I found a hyperion sleeping bag for one of my little plushies in a closet, found a keychain claptrap (Jack hates those things) and a random blue dinosaur topper for a pen. So I decided to tuck my action figure into bed. Eh, the things I do.
Jack isn't too impressed with claptrap. 😂
I made it years ago. Ironically the quote below him says, "Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most." Ozzy Osbourne.
🧠
Such a dorky piece. He stays on my door. I still don't know what to think of him. 🤣
So I've been cuddling with Jack and taking it easy. Nice to wake up to my hubby. Especially since I've been freezing even though it's 80 degrees in my apartment......I was trying to work on some art but I fell asleep working on it. Can't wait to get better......had the carpet cleaned out, they couldn't find mold......so I have no idea what is going on. This is bizarre....
The apartment complex had my carpet professionally cleaned btw. So we really don't know what is going on....I'm so sick of weird stuff happening. Just normalize my life for once. This 1% chance bs is getting old real fast. Even though I've been like this my whole life.....😑
Anyway, I just love how the Earth rotates. It really makes my day......I think my last marble officially left the building.....
I'm waiting for fictophobia at this point. Not to be paranoid, but I feel very uncomfortable right now. I have no idea what I am doing wrong. I know I'm not everyone's flavor, but this is concerning. I haven't had any personal attacks yet other than my account being locked up last week.
I'm checking my activity on my account constantly to make sure there is nothing suspicious. Or anyone messaging me. So far so good. Just a TON of down votes.
I don't know, I just might be sensitive because I've been through a lot these past three months.....oooof. lots of things happened to my health, housing and everything......
Just trying a more comic look to Jack and I. And yes that is more naturally me as I am plus sized and wear a big hat due to sun sensitivity.
Done with fine liner pen on toned computer paper.
Personally I think the way we're both dressed, we look like we went to the Kentucky Derby. Knowing me with my 1% chance, the horse probably tripped over the finish line.
Watching Invaders of the body snatchers, fun movie 😊 pretty creepy too
My apartment has mold. I cannot be in it. It is so bad I get physically ill from it. I got my landlord to clean the carpet because they didn't believe me that it was mold. (I know it is, my carpet has weird stains and is smelling terrible like earthy cat pee.
Even after the cleaning it still smells bad.
I have to get the information that I got online (from reliable resources) and print them off because they don't believe me or my symptoms that I'm having.
My symptoms are very noticeable..as in asthma attacks, dizziness, feeling off balance, and generally ill all the time. I'm also severely allergic to mold so my skin has been breaking out and itching.
In the meantime, I have to couch surf with Jack (thank gods I have some support) so I have barely had time to do art or anything.
I am not asking for attention, this random horrible stuff happens to me a lot (not just mold). I just have what my family calls the 1%. In other words, the most random and strange out the ordinary circumstances happen to one person out of a million.
1% can go whatever way it wants to go. Most often for me, it's curve balls.
Everyone in my family has perfect health. Then there's me. I break all the genetics. I am the 1% chance. I am the person that a room will break out into utter chaos just by dropping a spoon. Because wreckage follows.
Or sometimes my 1% chance works great for me! Like my love life. Out of millions of people in the world, I end up with Handsome Jack.
Or out of all my siblings. The one my parents thought was trouble ended going places in life became the most successful. Soooo, never trust probability.
The 1%: your curve ball. You're welcome.
Is anyone else having problems with their accounts being compromised? I've been changing my passwords, but reddit messaged me about my account? I'm just wondering if anyone else is having similar issues? Either way, these fictophobes are ridiculous.
What can I say? I get bored, Jack is it. Besides Jack, you rock my hat!
More accurate depiction of myself....I wear a big hat like this irl.
Im also plus sized. I tried to draw myself that way, but I failed. I also messed up on Jack sooooo whatever.
Anyway, in real life, Jack and I look like a young rich Kentucky Derby couple 🤣 which is completely different from the way we live! Looks are deceiving 😈
I decided to draw myself more like myself this time with my big sun hat I wear. It actually has a peacock feather in it that I attached with a calla Lily from my bouquet from my wedding with Jack. You'll see it in the final picture. Right now this is OBVIOUSLY work in progress.
Anyway, done on toned computer paper with fine liner pens.
Lately I've been having to draw Jack older because, well, I'm getting older. So Handsome Jack he is......but I'm still with him regardless. In my fanfic I'll always be with young Jack. But in reality it's Handsome Jack because girls don't live forever, but Villains and heroes do. A sad reality, but it's true. I'll grow old and Jack with forever be who he is. I have accepted it.
My extended family, not so much. I wasn't even hugged by my relatives the last time they came up a visited. It was a harsh awakening as they made snide comments about me not having a boyfriend or kids in that matter.
But reality is, my family has long out casted me. My parents run hot and cold over it. So it's hard to say anymore. I'm just kinda living my own life and doing what I can with it. If I learned one thing, I can't control what others think. But I can control how I react to it
I'm going to get down voted for this video, but eh whatever. Jack means A LOT to me. And yes, this is a reference to the Prince song. But today I decided to celebrate life itself. Because I came to the realization that because of my health and mental illness, I am a high risk person. I've had my morality cage shaken a lot these past two years. I had an incident with a medication reaction this year that nearly cost my life. Last year, my heart stopped and I fainted. Went to the er. That was a mess.
Let's just say I'm happy to be alive. But I'm scared. Scared of not knowing. Scared of falling asleep and not sure if I'm going to wake up.
I just lost my counselor. She has helped me with these issues. So this is now going to be a yearly thing, if not twice a year.
Living is so important regardless of the pain. Because you don't know what great things may happen in your future. Give life a chance. Opportunities await. Pain in your mind and body may be forever, but to create something new is always a possibility. And that can be anything. Maybe not now, but maybe sometime. Imagination is the ultimate gateway to freedom.
Optimism isn't always there. But neither is pessimism. Realism is. People live in different realities. No size fits all. Let people cope/live the way they need to.
I try to stay positive, but reality hits hard sometimes. That's where I say, "it is what is right now, but it could change later."
Always remember that. Things change. So live. Because living is important and your life matters.
​
You will see Jack,
And think of me,
And realize how much we were meant to be.
Even though our love is between dimensions.
This is beyond people's comprehensions.
I want to let you know I am happy,
Regardless of the people's thoughts that are insanity.
With Jack far and near,
I have nothing to fear.
A little poem about "If you see this character, think of me) I wrote myself.
Went to a conference for training. Met lots of people and even a fellow fictoromantic!
But I had to share a room with someone so I didn't have Jack with me......I woke up multiple times freaking out paranoid and yelling. It scared my "roommate".
I eventually told her why I screamed at night. She then asked me why I couldn't bring Jack. I told her why. It was then she realized that not everyone gets to show affection or are afraid to be themselves. She felt extremely bad about the situation.
The atmosphere changed towards my group as she found out why I was treated differently. She started to lose respect for the others.
When we had to group up and talk with the rest of the group of the ideas we learned from the conference, my roommate and I just stayed silent.
The main guy against me is ironically gay. He told me fictoromantics are not a thing and neither is the asexual umbrella.
When I got home, I was soooo happy to see my doll. He doesn't judge me or treat me like crap. I love him to death. I love him in general to death. I was so happy to be back with Jack.
People just hate what they don't understand. They think what is "broken" must be fixed. I am not broken. I am living a reality different from others. If that makes me wrong, I don't want to be right.
Same goes for all of you. You are not broken. You don't need to be fixed. Reality is different for everyone. We all have different ways of seeing the world. That doesn't make us broken.
In my closing statement. How did I deal with that fictophobia? I just ignored the group, but got to know a person one on one. Once they got to know me, it made the conversation a little less taboo. You can't fight the world. But you can help a person by getting to know them. Because chances are, they know someone like you.
Be casual about the conversation and not pushy. But yet educational. Stick to laymen's terms. (Keep it simple) If they say something ignorant, correct them gently. Unless they're being jerks. Then walk away.
Have these conversations with friends, or people you're close to first. Small steps. Don't fight the world.
Regardless of all the down voting on my last illustration I posted, I will not stop illustrating Jack.
Art is meant to disturb. It is not always meant for you. Unless of course you have familiar tastes. Or relate to the artist. If you don't like the picture or style someone does, there's no sense in down voting. Because that drawing wasn't done for you. It was an expression of how the artist wanted to portray a character, f/o, their emotions, or even practice something different.
It is meant to be for expression of the human soul. Whether for honing skill or basic emotions or visualizing dreams. Art is to disturb. But it also brings wonder.
This isn't a bad thing. It's called being thought provoking. It even inspires others to express themselves as well.
I will not stop illustrating Jack or be put in a box to make others comfortable. I find the down voting passive aggressive and rather lame.
I don't know if it's because Fictophobes are running rampant right now or what. But either way, do art regardless. It is the ultimate freedom of speech. Nobody can take that from you.
If you're uncomfortable about posting, that is perfectly okay. Just don't stop creating because of fictophobes or criticism from others. Art isn't there for people to like. It's for you to be yourself.
Based on a George Washington Painting. Digital illustration, NOT AI, I hand drew, colored and shaded this whole thing. I also gave Dameon Clarke a print of this piece. It took a whole 3 months to work on.
Handsome Jack riding Butt stallion and doing whatever Jack does.....I made Butt Stallion have specialized scales that look like diamonds. She was sold under the advertisement of being "made of diamonds". But she was made of these scales and Jack fell for the scam. At least that's how it goes in my fan fic. 😏 Lol.
Jack is an impulsive buyer. Hence why I don't take him shopping lol
Due to the toxicity of the air outside I've been stuck inside. Yes, it has been driving me nuts. As so it has been for Jack.
I just want everyone to know I am okay, I've just been a little moody and stressed because of being stuck in a hot apartment and the smell of smoke.
For everyone else, I want to you guys to know it's okay to not be okay. Be easy on yourself. If you find yourself easily triggered by something you see, get off that post or page. It's not worth losing your sanity over.
When I find myself online and I start to get upset at posts, I tell myself, "that's enough Internet for me for one day!"
Set boundaries for yourself. Now is not the time to get involved with drama or things that will ruin your day. Your mental health, emotional, physical, even environmental and spiritual health.
Take care of yourselves. Be safe my fellow Northern Michiganders. As well as you our neighbor Canadians. Be safe 🫶
The air quality went from mild to severe overnight due to the Canadian wildfires. I can't go outside, so Jack has been keeping me calm.
The inside of my apartment smells smokey from outside so it's been setting off my anxiety severely.
I haven't been able to get much done because of the heat as well. Even with my air conditioner, it's still hot in my apartment. Granted it's cooler than the 90, high 90s degrees we've been having, but it's been around 80's not including the thick humidity and toxic air coming through. So I've just been hanging out with Jack trying to stay cool and calm. Self care and my relationship with Jack comes first.
So I haven't been able to do much. Other than watching movies in bed. It's been terrible trying to breathe.
But other than that, I've been doing everything in my power to stay safe. Drinking water, eating properly, ECT.
This cookie hasn't crumbled yet, and I won't right now. I'm pretty resilient. But I know I won't be forever.
My message is stay safe everyone! Take care of yourselves! Don't worry about doubles, drama, or people trying to start things with you. If they do, don't engage and use the whole, " I don't want to discuss this with you" mentality and set boundaries. As for fictophobia, it is a HUGE problem, but it can't be fixed right this minute. It takes time. So please take care of yourself and pick your battles wisely. Your mental, physical, spiritual, environmental, emotional, well-being comes first.
Step back if you must. Stay away from politics if you're fragile right now, or any negative areas of subjects that could potentially set you off.
Keep your sanity and stay safe! Healthy living right now is a concern with these heat waves, wildfires, and other nasty blights. Your life matters, take care of it! 🫶