u/Ambitious_Finger_346

I genuinely don’t understand how people casually hook up

Hi guys I'm 16

So ever since me and my ex broke up, I’ve honestly been exhausted from feelings and romance in general. And realistically, I know I’m probably not gonna find “the love of my life” in the environment I’m in right now anyway.

But at the same time, I’m horny as hell AND I miss physical contact in general. And not even always sexually. Like one of the things I genuinely crave most is literally just falling asleep in a hug with a girl.

So I thought “okay, smt casual then, easyyy.”

Yeah no. Apparently it’s not fucking easy at all because I seem completely incapable of getting into one. It’s been like half a year already.

And the thing is — I’m not some socially awkward basement goblin either. I’m good looking, confident, funny, and genuinely charismatic. I know saying that on Reddit sounds delusional as hell, but I’m saying it based on what other people tell me constantly.

I also don’t really go to parties, clubs, or that whole scene, which probably makes this harder, but still. Statistically after this many attempts I should’ve eventually met at least ONE girl who’s into the same thing.

But somehow every single time it just goes nowhere.

I should also mention: I’m very direct. I don’t lie to girls or pretend I want a relationship just to get something physical. At some point after getting to know each other, I say pretty clearly what I’m looking for.

But then… nothing happens. Every. Single. Time.

And I mention this because some of my friends — who honestly don’t know much about this either — came up with this theory that apparently you need to “make it clear without saying it directly.”

And like… what the fuck does that even mean?

If I’m already making it obvious, why does saying it out loud suddenly ruin it?

And the worst part is I genuinely don’t understand HOW this stuff actually happens for other people. Because I know dudes who are casually hooking up all the time, but they’re not manipulative jerks or fake relationship scammers either. It’s mutual, everyone understands what’s happening, and honestly some of them aren’t even more attractive than me. They just somehow know how to play this game and I absolutely do not.

So yeah Reddit, this is your moment to shine because I need guidance 😭

Most of my friends either don’t know , or I’m not close enough with them to ask this kind of stuff.

So yeah. First Reddit post.

I’d love advice from any age honestly, but if there are teenagers here who actually have experience with this stuff, please pass me your wisdom.

So ever since me and my ex broke up, I’ve honestly been exhausted from feelings and romance in general. And realistically, I know I’m probably not gonna find “the love of my life” in the environment I’m in right now anyway.

But at the same time, I’m horny as hell AND I miss physical contact in general. And not even always sexually. Like one of the things I genuinely crave most is literally just falling asleep in a hug with a girl.

So I thought “okay, situationship, easyyy.”

Yeah no. Apparently it’s not fucking easy at all because I seem completely incapable of getting into one. It’s been like half a year already.

And the thing is — I’m not some socially awkward basement goblin either. I’m good looking, confident, funny, and genuinely charismatic. I know saying that on Reddit sounds delusional as hell, but I’m saying it based on what other people tell me constantly.

I also don’t really go to parties, clubs, or that whole scene, which probably makes this harder, but still. Statistically after this many attempts I should’ve eventually met at least ONE girl who’s into the same thing.

But somehow every single time it just goes nowhere.

I should also mention: I’m very direct. I don’t lie to girls or pretend I want a relationship just to get something physical. At some point after getting to know each other, I say pretty clearly what I’m looking for.

But then… nothing happens. Every. Single. Time.

And I mention this because some of my friends — who honestly don’t know much about this either — came up with this theory that apparently you need to “make it clear without saying it directly.”

And like… what the fuck does that even mean?

If I’m already making it obvious, why does saying it out loud suddenly ruin it?

And the worst part is I genuinely don’t understand HOW this stuff actually happens for other people. Because I know dudes who are casually hooking up all the time, but they’re not manipulative jerks or fake relationship scammers either. It’s mutual, everyone understands what’s happening, and honestly some of them aren’t even more attractive than me. They just somehow know how to play this game and I absolutely do not.

So yeah Reddit, this is your moment to shine because I need guidance 😭

Most of my friends either don’t know either, or I’m not close enough with them to ask this kind of stuff.

So yeah. First Reddit post.

I’d love advice from any age honestly, but if there are teenagers here who actually have experience with this stuff, please pass me your wisdom.